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My bf will be temporarily living with me (and my roomies) over the summer. People keep saying we'll get sick of each other since we'll have so much free time. I don't really believe it, but I'm getting a little worried. Will it change our relationship? What can we do to keep things fun, but also have our own space?

It'll change your relationship a little bit, sure. You'll have to get used to cohabiting and melding your possessions and personal quirks. But remember that it's only temporary. You get a taste of living together without actually having to take the plunge. Your guy knows he'll be moving out once the summer is over, so some of the pressure of moving in together is taken off.

First off, set aside some personal space for him. Give him a bookshelf, a couple drawers, etc. If he has comic books, video games, marathon medals, whatever, give him some space so he feels at home.

For the rest of the space, maybe decorate an area together or pick out a new piece of furniture with your other roommates. Include your guy on apartment decisions so he feels like he's an equal part of home and not just your boyfriend who is staying there.

Otherwise, continue things as they've been. If there were days when you did your own thing and only saw each other briefly, continue that. Keep having "date nights" and go out and do fun things together. Don't settle into a domestic rut. Obviously you'll be spending more time together, but the relationship doesn't have to change if you aren't ready. There's no reason to force yourself into domesticity if this is just a temporary situation. Maybe it's a test to see how it'll be living together, or maybe it's just a few months where you guys played house. It's more important in the long run to focus on making the relationship work and to give each other space when needed.
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4 Comments

silkysly

I would suggest talking to him about what Nick said, prior to him moving in. “Let’s still have date night, let’s still have our own time.” (that sort of thing) Communication beforehand will make it easier on the both of you AND your roommate.

Jlove

I went through a similar situation last winter. During winter break my then boyfriend moved in with me and it didn't change our relationship at all. We gave each other space to do our own thing. I might be watching tv in my room and him in the living room doing work or vice versa. We still had 'date nights' or rather date afternoons like going to the movies or little things like that.

Like Nick said, no need to change your current relationship dynamic just because he's temporarily living with you. Enjoy having your boyfriend this summer and enjoy it to the fullest!

user-pic

You'll basically find out how strong your relationship is. If you love each other, then it will work and you'll find a way to live together lovingly, and if there are hidden issues then they will definitely be brought to the surface. If you think your relationship is at the point where you want to put it through something like that then the best of luck to you. It's a make or break scenario. :)

user-pic

Thanks haha. That's really helpful...I was seriously starting to worry because everyone was saying how hard it would be and how things would end up getting messed up. I wasn't worried until then because I really love spending time with my boyfriend and thought it would be nice to test out living together and enjoying more time together. Now I can go back to being excited! Also, he seems kind of excited and said he was going to teach me how to cook over the summer since I always get jealous of his skills haha Yay =)

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