Wow, that's awkward. And thank you for the "slapping sounds" part. Now I won't be able to get that image out of my head.
Next time you see him, this is what you say:
You: Hey, Mike (or whatever his name is). How's it going?
Mike: Good. The faucet has been a little leaky.
You: Oh yeah? I'll take a look at it. Oh, one more thing. Just wanted to let you know that the walls here are really thin. Like paper thin. I mean, you can hear everything. So if you're, say, listening to music or have a guest over or are just having "private time" or whatever, you might want to consider closing the door. Just something to keep in mind.
Mike [his face now red upon the sudden realization that his landlady can hear his every "slapping sound"]: Uh, yeah, will do. Gotta go!
Do this, and you'll never have a problem with him again. In fact, he'll probably be as quiet as a mouse. You won't even know he's there.
Next time you see him, this is what you say:
You: Hey, Mike (or whatever his name is). How's it going?
Mike: Good. The faucet has been a little leaky.
You: Oh yeah? I'll take a look at it. Oh, one more thing. Just wanted to let you know that the walls here are really thin. Like paper thin. I mean, you can hear everything. So if you're, say, listening to music or have a guest over or are just having "private time" or whatever, you might want to consider closing the door. Just something to keep in mind.
Mike [his face now red upon the sudden realization that his landlady can hear his every "slapping sound"]: Uh, yeah, will do. Gotta go!
Do this, and you'll never have a problem with him again. In fact, he'll probably be as quiet as a mouse. You won't even know he's there.
hysterical, nick.
Dogs masturbate? I knew Border Collies were smart, but damn.
Hahahahaha! Oh, what a difference an "a" can make! :-D
McNasty...., but funny.
Most guys learn very early on that when pleasing ones self, one must be discrete.
Given his leaving the door open and his loudness, it makes me wonder if perhaps he wants you to hear and is a bit of an exhibitionist. Maybe he fancies making his me-time become we-time. Eww!
I thought the same thing, Jan. Guys know how to pull that off (pun intended) without getting caught. If you're hearing him, he's either deaf or showing off.
You're all too nice. Next time you hear that nonsense, bang on the wall and scream something totally embarrasing thru the walls. You shouldn't have to put up with that sexual harrasment. Then when you see him in the common areas of the house, tell him if he doesn't keep it down you'll have to file a complaint for sexual harrasment. Unless he has a law background, it will probably scare him back into his pants.
oh wow thats crazy i would tell him to keep it down