When a guy says he wants his woman to be "slutty," what he means is he wants her to be more aggressive. And not just aggressive about initiating sex. But aggressive about satisfying her own sexual needs. An active participant in a contact sport between two competitors in love .He wants her to want it.
A "slut,"in this context, is a woman who wants sex, because sex feels good. Who isn't an oppressed, coquettish little Cupie doll afraid to express her desires. She craves orgasms that make her bones sing like chimes. She has a lust for lust. She doesn't apologize when she surrenders to abandon. Like a horny arsonist, she brazenly ignites wild fires in her own gut. This "slut" is a woman who wants you to rock her from behind while her panties are still on. You know she wants this because that's what she's whispering to you as she slams you up against a wall and presses her tits into you. She's in control. It's her turn to order off the menu and she's hungry for booty. There will be more food metaphors to come.
Let me congratulate both of you for talking about this sexual lull. The truth is, sexual energies wax and wane in relationships. A dry spell is nothing to freak out about. That you actually broached the topic with your man, and was able to pull out of him valuable information bodes well for both of you.
He wants you to be "slutty." He has given you permission to enjoy yourself. Unleash your inner f**k beast! Be as kinky as you want to be. Tear him up and eat him raw. This is what he wants. Talk dirty. Wear something slinky that makes you feel naughty. Dress up like, I don't know, a Vulcan hooker or a vampire schoolgirl (Um. Maybe that's just me.) Give him a passport to your fantasy world: let him know exactly where you want him to put his mouth.
Speaking of mouths, have you ever made a meal for someone who was really, really hungry? It is extremely satisfying to watch a person with an appetite scarf down a plate of food you've prepared. Your boyfriend's request is like THAT.
He wants to see your appetite. Show him.
Nice answer! That got ME a little worked up and feeling "slutty!" I know my boyfriends have always appreciated it when I either attacked them if I was feeling frisky or when I was really into our romps and my enjoyment was obvious. It works both ways too...who hasn't gotten more turned on if their man starts to moan and thrust a little harder when in the middle of a passionate moment?
HOT
WOW. Um. Wow.
Wow, my inner f**k beast is growling now. Good thing its a friday. Thanks JDV!
Why is it in these situations it's always the woman that has to go above and beyond to spice things up? If the guy is complaining, why can't he put forth more effort? You hear this over and over and it's always the same... "be slutty, wear lingerie, talk dirty, do him like he's never been done before" ad nauseam. I don't get it... it' takes two yet it is the woman's responsibility to keep it hot? If a guy wants to be in my boudoir, he best be doing more than just laying there.
You said that he should put in more effort, but I think that's the point, he probably feels like he's putting in too much effort. Here goes a food metaphor. Lets say the girl cooks all the time, she's eventually gonna get tired and will want her man to cook for her. Only it's the guy thats always cooking and he wants his girl to cook, and it's not cooking it's sex. If that makes any sense. Lol.
Ref Player is correct, that's what the guy wants, but so what? It's too much damn effort, and it's not for us, it's for the guy. The average woman is not waiting for "permission" to unleash her inner vampire schoolgirl. Some women are freaks at heart, but more often, I think this stuff is just playacting to try to keep the guy interested. It works for a while and then it wears off too, just like the tamer sex did. In the meantime, sexual activities that may conflict with the woman's values and sense of who she is can leave her with some bad feelings that outlast the relationship.
"slutty" is a horrible word to describe a woman empowered by her sexual urges. The word "slutty" to me implies desperation for male attention, if you ask me. If she's too shy in bed to speak up about what she wants then its good her boyfriend gave her the green light to do so. However, if she is comfortable in bed but she's just not aggressive by nature then she shouldnt pretend to be.
In this case, dont change the girl, change the sex! Do it on the kitchen counter, outside on a hammoc, in the car! Give some road head (although, make sure if youre doing it in traffic the traffic is NOT because of an upcoming TOLL BOOTH.... no need to explain further lol ). Get a kama sutra book and try some new positions! Have sex at different times during the day. Watch porn together! She doesnt need a new personality, they just need some new sex!
If acting like you enjoy sex and want it is going above and beyond to spice things up, maybe you should rethink being in a relationship. If he's a decent lover, he puts a lot of effort into pleasuring you. Why don't you return the favor? When was the last time you just grabbed him by the root and hauled him into the bedroom? Woke him up with a blow job? Just said, "Thank You," after a good time in bed?
If you don't like it, just tell him so, and let him find someone who does.
Here' some suggestions:
Tell him very explicitly exactly what you want and how you like it best...
Let him hear you begging for more more or harder harder or faster faster and screaming ohhhhhyesyesyes and then giving him a slow blowjob even after he's finished and telling him how greaatttt he was...and how you can't wait to do it again....
Let him come home from work and accidentlyonpurpuse discover you masturbating and playing with your vibrator...and assure him you were just thinking about making love to him and couldn't wait...
Sometimes when he is least expecting it, unzip his pants, grab his cock and give him a handjob or go down on him...maybe even in a public place like diving under the table in a restaurant...and tell him it's because he turns you on so much you couldn't wait...
Do a striptease for him...wake him with a blowjob...
Surprise him with a porn flick on the dvd or vcr and tell him you want to do everything they're doing...and that you want to make your own sex pictures or videos with him...
Wear sexy, revealing clothes when you go with him to a swingin' bar and let him see the men -- and women -- getting hot for you but assure him he is the only one you want...
Or, if you and he really are adventurous, let him see you makin' out with other guys -- or girls -- in threesomes, foursomes or moresomes...with assurances he's still the best and you just wanted to give him a thrill...
The list could go on...but I can't type right now...