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Mystery Man

 
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My boyfriend is upset with me, but he keeps saying he's "not mad." He obviously is, because he's being short with me. He will call me just to not talk to me! How do I get him to stop pouting and communicate with me like an adult?

Ironically the best way to get this guy to start talking and act like an adult is to treat him like a little baby. Stop talking to him, just as he's not talking to you. Trust me, he'll come around soon.

When someone pouts and acts tense and short like this, but insists nothing is the matter, what they are really saying is "I'M A BIG BABY! I NEED ATTENTION." Every time you ask him what's the matter you are feeding into this game. Just ignore it and him and he'll be ready to talk lickety-split.

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5 Comments

user-pic

Does this work when you're taking a "break" too? Will he come around if I don't call him?

boop

My favorite post by you, Mystery Man. Giving the cold shoulder is so immature. Calling just to NOT talk to you?? That's ridiculous... I agree, though. Be icy, too, and he'll get tired of the act.

meiggs

I hate to say it but... this is spot on. I'm not a manipulative person, it has just been my natural reaction in the past and I was surprised by how well it worked. I think it should be made clear that shutting down and ignoring the person should only be used in this situation, not in ALL relationship problems.

user-pic

Good advice.

yarittza

yup. he'll realize you're not feeding into his bull

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