Well, this may be the way he's always talked to his female friend and his ex and he thinks it's harmless. Or it could be a sign that he's not happy and fully committed. This could be a sign that he's starting to check out of the relationship and wonder if he wants to have a girlfriend.
If he's with you 90% of the time and you're in a committed relationship, he shouldn't be flirting with anyone. This is definitely worth talking about. Ask him if he's happy, and let him know that his flirting hurts you. It could be that the friend flirts with him and he lets it happen as an ego booster. Whatever the reason, he shouldn't be doing it. The fact that he's flirting with TWO women while spending all of his time with you makes him eligible for a douchebag of the week award. Talk about this with him now before he cheats. Even if he doesn't plan to cheat, he's still being unfaithful to you.
You should also talk to the friend woman, she's not entirely innocent in this situation. You said yourself she's got designs on your boyfriend and it sounds like to me she's trying to stir things up. Not exoneration your boyfriend either, mind you, he may only see it as harmless flirting, but clearly its not harmless to you. Friends recognize boundaries, and this "friend", she is crossing them consistently. A nice little chat, telling her to layoff your boyfriend.
Also talk with your boyfriend, telling him its inappropriate to flirt back, and outright wrong to initiate flirting. Tell him it bothers you, and he needs to stop.
It is the boyfriend's female friend. His girlfriend talking to her about this should be a last resort thing. In fact, there is no need. Regardless of what the friend should know, it is the boyfriend who is in the relationship.
When you say flirty, what exactly do you mean?
he's written her about times in the past, brought up memories when they've been intimate, not sure about any other because I haven't had the guts to look on his phone to find out. He has told me that they may write a "I miss you" once in a while, but the rest is purely friendly. When I asked him about it, he's said he likes to get a reaction out of them. He is the type that likes to get a reaction out of people, his friends, family, in a good way, not the sleezy, dumb type of jokster. I think I'm just looking for a reasurance that isn't there, but I appreciate all the feed back!!!
This is a tough one. My best friend and I like to tease/flirt with one another. Have for years. We're both committed to our respective relationships. But, you know, I WOULD take it as a small warning sign, just to be sure. It may be nothing, as in my case, but it might not be.
I agree, if it were a close friend of his, who he's never had anythign with, then I don't think it would bother me. thanks!!
My bf & I were together 90% of the time, but he managed to make the most of that 10% & cheat on me. Go with your gut….
You're right!!! It's never failed me in the past, why stop trusting it now. Thanks guys!!! This was a tremendous help! :)