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My boyfriend of three months is super sensitive to my tone when I'm frustrated. He says he doesn't feel safe. I think he's being a pussy. What do you think?

I agree. That's just bizarre. Who is this nervous little man you're dating, Woody Allen?

I'm assuming you don't make a habit of smacking the guy upside the head, right? When you're frustrated, is it just your tone that puts him on edge, or do you have a bad temper, too? Do you scream at him? Hurl shoes and pottery? No? I didn't think so.

Was he abused as a child or, at least, grow up in a volatile home,? Or maybe he had a previous girlfriend who beat his ass. Did he ever date Tawny Kitaen?

If none of those things applies, then yes, he certainly sounds odd and gonad-like. Are you going to be able to handle that as your relationship grows? Everyone adjusts their behavior to accommodate a partner's needs, but if you're not doing anything but expressing normal everyday frustration and he's curled up on the floor in the fetal position, that will get old fast. Just something to think about.

In the meantime give the boy a Xanax and a Snuggie and tell him to deal with it.

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4 Comments

Smama

What a little bitch. But let's not knock the Snuggie, OK?

user-pic

wus puss!!! what? i think that would make me wanna give him a good reason not to feel safe.. like bitch-slapping him!!!! guys have taken this role-reversal independent woman thing too far. all yall need to grow some nuts and step the fuck up! also, beware of overly passive aggressive people in general. they can anger ten times more than the shameless jerks.

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Wow. A man shows you his insecurity and you call him a pussy? That's just being a bitch. Would you expect your man to call you a pussy because you get scared when he yells? Hell no! Maybe it's time you show him some comfort because he obviously has reason to feel unsafe. Whether that unsafe is you leaving him or you hurting him, just because he is a male doesn't mean he automatically has to be a hard ass. Now THAT is sexist.

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well, i would talk to him and see why he is acting this way. maybe he had a hard childhood and is still emotionally scared from something that has happened to him in his past.

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