You can, but I wouldn't recommend it. In fact, I would strongly recommend against it.
Your concern is admirable, but this is their business, not yours. You aren't part of the family. It doesn't matter how long you've been with your guy or what the issue is, it's not your place to interfere, good intentions or not. And when the issue is something as touchy as drug use (and illegal drug use, to boot), then you really need to stay out of it, especially since Pop is the family dealer.
What are you gonna do, appeal to the conscience of a guy who supplies dope to his kids? Persuade a teenager with easy access to weed to put down the bong and study? Good luck with that. First you will have to convince them that the pot-smoking and the slipping grades are a problem at all, because they don't seem to think so.
No, this is their family dynamic. You have nothing to gain and a lot to lose by inserting yourself into their business. I say butt out--way out--at least until you can marry into this fine family, which I hope you will do, because they sound like super-awesome people. *blink*
Thanks for the question.
I don't know... A parent supplying their underage kid with illegal drugs and you don't step in in some way? You just look the other way? That seems wrong to me. The kid isn't old enough to make responsible decisions for himself and his parent obviously won't either. I'd say someone has to step in.
Ideally that person would be your boyfriend. (Incidentally, I would find it troubling if he found the drug use/schoolwork to be ok.) Sure it isn't great that you're the one that has to do something, but shouldn't someone??
It seems like people have soft spots for things like alcohol and weed, but honestly if you saw him providing almost any other illegal item to the kid on a regular basis, I don't know if the hesitation would be as strong. Though, I do think Cary is right in saying you could lose a lot in this situation, namely your bf, but if your bf doesn't see this as a problem, I see possible trouble for you guys anyway.
I agree with you in principle, but reality is a little bit harder. What should she do, turn him into the cops? The boyfriend will dump her and the dad might retaliate. I agree, no big loss on the bf, but she might disagree. I'm more concerned about her well-being than the kid's. Nothing she can say or do will make his father a good parent.
Thanks for the reply. I agree--tough situation. I couldn't think of a great way for her to get involved either, just that if I were in that situation and the options were "do something" and "not do something," I'd probably have to do something.
It sucks that there are parents like this. He's a bad parent for doing this to his son, but how much would the son suffer if the dad went to jail or just lost custody? It's so lose-lose. In the end, though, I think the son is suffering more in this situation.
I like the anonymous note idea. At the least the school intervention might scare the dad enough to stop, and it protects her from retaliation.
*blink* lmao
Perhaps she could send an anonymous note about what is going on to the boy's teacher or school principal. I believe most teachers are required by law to report any suspicions they have about child abuse or neglect to the proper authorities. That way perhaps someone else would intervene on the brother's behalf without directly implicating her. If his school work is suffering, the teacher may already suspect something is going on anyway. Somebody needs to stand up and care about that boy's welfare. It doesn't appear that anyone is doing it now.