I don't know. How long have you dated? What does she do that's crazy and controlling? Or could you be too sensitive to her? Breaking up with someone because of an annoying parent sounds like like a big jump to me. If everyone did that, we would all be single.
The significance of the problem depends on several things: what she does, how often she does it, and whether or not your boyfriend objects and tries to prevent it. The last one is key: if he doesn't try to avoid her or stop her meddling, or if he wants the two of you to be around her all the time despite her repellent personality, that doesn't bode well for your future. Most people with an annoying parent simply keep them at arm's length and set clear boundaries about butting into their lives. If his mom's behavior doesn't bother your guy, you will never convince him to address the problem. "What problem? That's just the way she is."
If, on the other hand, she's just your typical parent who's occasionally meddlesome and annoying, well, welcome to the world of future in-laws. Wait until you're married--it gets a lot more fun. Then you have their grandchildren, and the merriment reaches epic proportions.
Without knowing you or her or what she does, I can only say that you have to decide if having him in your life is worth having her in your life, too. She won't change, even if he wants her to. If he isn't bothered by her personality, she will become a sticking point in your relationship. If he won't avoid her, you can only avoid her so much, too. Your decision depends on how he feels about her and whether or not you love him enough to overlook her interference.
Thanks for the question.
what if your boyfriend adores his mother though?
I'm in the same boat as you, except it's his father..total control freak, actually calls him to come home from dates because he wants US to watch a movie with him..so i feel ya!
I agree with WA in that the key to deciding what to do centers on how the BF behaves. Assuming actual irritation, meddling, and controlling is going, whether or not your BF stands up to his mom and comes to your defense, or simply cowers down in silence, that will determine if you should stay or if you should go.
I think it would have more to do with him than her. I mean is he the type to go along with his mother [ie: a momas boy] and give you a hard time if shes on him about something to do with you? Or is he the type to just roll his eyes at it and go about doing what he plans on doing?
Id say if its his moms problem do your best to deal with it, or ignore her or whatever. If he's a mamas boy who wants to please her and as a result gives you a hard time based on what she doing or saying then move on.
But its certainly not fair to him to dump him over his mother. I mean my girlfriends grandmother is totally against me because I'm not Italian, despite the fact that her son is maried to a Scottish woman [and my background is Irish/Scottish] but I'd never say "see you later" cuz her grandmother thinks she should ship off to Italy to find a husband. Thats nonsense.
Okay who will have answers to this, but letting him go and is not what i want, obviously i'm hearing mine is a momma's boy also. Not that i don't want him to have no relationshhip with his parents or nothing cause that's not what i want or mean. My Fiance's mom is really rude to me, i mean sometimes we get along, but when it comes down to her finding out her sons in my house she has a total BF i want her to understand i;m not tryin to compete against her or steal her son away from her to where she has nothin to do with him, but she DOES NOT want him moving out, and he does NOT want to live with her. My Fiance is 20 and in a wheelchair, his mother punished him for a while and took his phone from him and he is extremely TERRIFIED of her, Also i have counselor lady that visits me when she can and i set an appointment with his father and him to sign papers with his fathers consent on him being able to move out because he told me his dad was gonna do it, couple days ago i found out he doesnt really want his son moving either out! i;m sayin he's a grown man and should be allowed to make his own decisions his mother puts him down bad and tells ppl he cant take care of himself, and i know he can, ! he goes thru hell and back and is tired of it! but he tells me he's not leeavin me cus of their bs, i've been with him for 1 year and 2 months, and i miss him like crazy! i havent heard from him or nothing maybe one word or a few this week but sneaking wise.