You and your partner are allowed to have different life experiences-- I'd even argue it makes for a more dynamic and rich relationship -- but what you can't have is an official hierarchy of experiences. In other words, my man's experiences are realer (deeper) than mine so I'll take the back seat in this relationship.
His experience with war and violence has played a part in who he is and how he sees things. That's valid. But your lack of violence first hand has made you who you are. Don't apologize for your past. It too is valid. Instead of ranking it, share it. Teach it. Blend it.
Lastly, there's nothing inherently good about being unfazed by horrors. I imagine he'd rather not have lived through many of the things he has and being with you allows him to reconnect to a more sensitive life. The "turn on" should come from the daily mixing of your identities not grading them.
Funny Guy
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