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ok i got my guy friend upset at me and he told me to give him space and time. should i give it to him and how long does this " i need space and to be alone" thing last for?

You're kind of an asshole aren't you?

If I'm reading your tone correctly - and I'd like to think that I am - you messed up, he asked for some time and now you're like "ugh, get over it" but thinking about giving him what he asked for since you, ya know, messed up.

What makes you think that you have any choice? If he wants space and time then he is going to get it. You don't get to decide that you won't give him space. So should you give to him? Yes. Because it's going to happen anyway. Just because you refuse to remove yourself from somebody's personal space doesn't mean that they're not checking out on you. You can't force somebody to feel differently than they do and if he wants space then that's what he's going to get. It's your fault anyway.

And how long does it last? As long as he needs OR as long as you're willing to wait. If you feel like he's taking too long to get over it and resume whatever you all have going on, then that's on you and you roll out. If you really did mess up and understand why he'd want to take that space then you wait until he's ready to come back around.

The one piece I'll give you a pass on is this: nobody deserves to be strung along and waiting for somebody to forgive them forever. Only you know what happened, so that piece is on you.

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5 Comments

chrissie1101

i cant believe nobody else came in to applaud you on this one, BFF. you nailed it as far as i can see. i'm going through this with a girlfriend of mine right now who has done something almost indefensible. she can't believe that i 'need space'...from her. i actually wonder if she's more pissed off with me that i was the one that sort of called 'the break' and she didn't, or what, but it is really irritating me. even more than if she had just given me my space and let it go. hard to forgive someone when they won't respect your wishes. next time she bugs me about whether or not i'm ready for 'that lunch yet' i might start off by saying just that, 'you're kind of an asshole, aren't you?' lol

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Good advice! I was in a simliar situation with a guy friend of mine. I told him how I felt about a situation, and he was upset about what I said. He told me that he needed some time to get over his feelings, and I honored that request. After a few days, we were on speaking terms again.

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I met a guy and we are familiar by the way I come from office. Suddenly one day he said that he he would die if I don'"t love him through the the phone and spoke to me only 3 days over the phone and ignores me after 3 or 4 days .Why?

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My best friend descried this in 2 ways to me.

There is the you two are dating and he loves you but he isnt attached to his phone way.

or the

He gets his fill and calls you when he needs you again way.

It sucks and both way drive girl BONKERS but it is how it is. The first way is where I am with my boyfriend. Says he wants to talk on the phone instead of text and talk me to sleep every night... and He will talk to me on monday and we dont speak again friday. It isnt cause he is annoyed or doesnt want to talk, he just has a LOT going on in his life and his phone stays put away as the last thing on his mind. He removes the distraction. Maybe it is the same with your man?

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he's def' seeing someone else... ony talks to you on Mon and not again until Fri..no phone? What about text? He's with another woman...4sure!

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