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RF, I've always appreciated you as a straight-shooter. I like a guy and we have chemistry. He seeks me out to talk to daily. He once commented that he "definitely didn't run straight" but hasn't ever mentioned it, or a partner, again. Is there a tactful way to clarify whether he's into women before I suggest going out?

There are one of two ways: you ask him out and see how he reacts, or you ask him outright if he's gay. The former has a little more finesse and tact than the later.

Look, nobody enjoys rejection, but as I've said elsewhere, there's no surefire gay detector.

So, first things first, remember that there's nothing huge at stake here. The worst thing that happens is he says "I'm sorry, I just want to be friends", and you continue to be friends. At best, he accepts and you possibly have the beginnings of a relationship.

Secondly, don't heavily charge it. Ask him out to something casual, but date like (think a sit-down dinner). That way, he doesn't feel obligated to accept if he doesn't want to, and you're not putting a lot on the line.

Consider it practice: it's good to be assertive.

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3 Comments

user-pic

What was the context of the comment? Maybe he literally cant run straight? Maybe he has a slight limp in the left leg that causes him to vere to the right while running?

I'm kidding, of course. What RP player said.

user-pic

Thinking I don't run straight meaning I am a bit off or quirky. I'm not typical.

user-pic

i am wondering if he might have meant that as he was a little devious? maybe?

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