Finally, someone has asked me the question I was born to answer! Your friendly neighborhood Mystery Man has spent countless years cataloguing and ranking every possible nickname a girl can call a guy. And now, at long last, he gets to share them!
For sake of convenience, I've divided them into three categories, which I will share with you now - Totally Awesome Nicknames, Acceptable But Sappy Nicknames, and Downright Horrible Nicknames. So let's do this thing.
Totally Awesome Nicknames
Sexy
Baby
Muscles (if you want a guy to get up and open a jar of pickles, call him "Muscles")
Bruiser
Flex
Tex
Rex
Heisenberg (especially if he runs a drug empire)
Acceptable But Sappy Nicknames
Honey
Sweetie
Cutie
Love (noun)
Downright Horrible Nicknames
Ladyface
Lightweight
Minuteman
The Boy (I'm waging war against ladies that call their crush/boyfriend "The Boy")
Three Inches of Fury
Lunchbox
Flacido The Disappearing Man
You're welcome, ladies.
"Three Inches of Fury" would make a great name for a band.
I used to call my man "Superman". Although he didn't outrightly say he liked it, he alluded to it when we had a conversation about his work (i.e. "I'm out saving the world.") It was kinda cute.
Heisenberg...., I love Breaking Bad!!
Oh god. I laughed so hard at the 'three inches of fury." And I thought I've heard worst such as "Baby carrot."
sweet cheeks
baby cakes
sexy beast
honey bunches of oats
pretty boy
sweety pie