Guyspeak Newsletter Signup

Funny Guy

 
Next Answer »
userpic
userpic

So I am in a relationship, but what do I do about a good guy friend who wants to be more than just friends with me and I don't want to hurt his feelings by telling him I am with someone already?

Are you kidding? You have the one legit excuse, the single get out of jail free card (although I guess lesbianism is another good one) when confronted with an awkward flirting scenario. Telling him you've already got a boyfriend is about the easiest you'll ever let a guy down. It's no harm, no foul. In his mind, if he'd met you a few weeks earlier, you'd be all over that.

In fact, there's a slight risk telling a guy you already have a boyfriend will just encourage him. But in that case, he'll likely piss you off enough that you won't care about hurting his feelings anymore. Either way, problem solved!

If you really can't man up, there's always the tacky (but effective) method of mentioning your boyfriend casually in conversation. As in, "oh, you like Cormac McCarthy? My boyfriend likes to read passages from The Road when I'm blowing him."

Trust me, he'll get the hint.

Talk 7
Love it? Hate it? 3
Got A Question? Ask Your Own. »

7 Comments

No

Honestly, I think it's completely inappropriate for you NOT to tell him. Why are you spending so much time with some single guy if you have a boyfriend already? How does your boyfriend feel about that? Does he even know? And do you seriously think it's ok to just string this other guy along and mess with his emotions? Do you just enjoy the attention?

How in the world are you going to "hurt his feelings" by telling him this? It's not as if it's some direct personal insult.

I'm sort of baffled right now as to why this question is even being asked. I really can't imagine a more obvious answer.

user-pic

awesome. she should use that quote.

user-pic

Another good one is to wear a ring on your left hand finger. Even if it's just a class ring or something you got from your mom on your 16th birthday, most guys aren't going to look closely enough to discern that it's not an engagement/wedding ring.
Oh, and Michael, I have a friend who is living with a woman, and the minute she says so, some guys try to view it as some sort of challenge and they hit on her even more, so no, the lesbian card doesn't work as well as you might think!

user-pic

Molly, spending time with another single guy isn't always 'stringing him along'. I have lots of single male friends, and unless they've been very, very deceitful over the years, none of us have any romantic interest in eachother.

And oh, Michael, if only lesbianism was an easy get-out-of-jail-free card. It's disturbing how many times I've been hit on walking with a female friend, told the guy(s) we're a couple to get him/them off our asses, and had him/them continue to harass us out of some warped belief that lesbians are secretly bisexual or something. Blech.

No

Sorry, but yes. It definitely is. She already knows that he is romantically attracted to her and she won't be straightforward with him. Spending more time with him after that fact sends the wrong signal. It is definitely "stringing him along."

kamakula

I sense lots of fail in this question.

How is it that you have a good friend not know you are in a relationship?

Either he is not a good friend, or you are making up this relationship then asking if you should lie to him about being in a relationship, except pretending that you are so you won't be told to lie.

user-pic

Let's be honest here, what she's really asking is, "How can you help me to keep my 'emotional tampon' around?"

Leave a comment

(You may use HTML tags for style)

Get GuySpeak in your inbox.

Choose the newsletters you'd like to receive:

Trending Topics

  1. 96 entries are tagged with
  2. 59 entries are tagged with
  3. 70 entries are tagged with
  4. 61 entries are tagged with
  5. 58 entries are tagged with
  6. 215 entries are tagged with
  7. 91 entries are tagged with
  8. 865 entries are tagged with
  9. 60 entries are tagged with
  10. 64 entries are tagged with
  11. 57 entries are tagged with
  12. 93 entries are tagged with
  13. 89 entries are tagged with
  14. 61 entries are tagged with
  15. 53 entries are tagged with
  16. 151 entries are tagged with
  17. 183 entries are tagged with
  18. 63 entries are tagged with
  19. 55 entries are tagged with
  20. 79 entries are tagged with
  21. 60 entries are tagged with
  22. 239 entries are tagged with
  23. 501 entries are tagged with
  24. 95 entries are tagged with
  25. 58 entries are tagged with