I'm not someone who often tells readers to "Caution on the side of paranoid" but I feel in this particular case, the facts (you've shared) lead me to think something's fishy up in here.
It sounds like he's laying the groundwork for some sort of shift; as if he's easing you into the concept that these days women find him terribly attractive and therefore he may have been or soon will be innocently dragged into some sort of situation or event.
It's sort of like a dude with ripped abs randomly announcing "it's frickin hot as hell in here" as a prelude to "the necessity" he take his shirt off. Or, a woman on a date, mentioning at the very start that she may be getting a call from her friend who desperately needs her immediate help with X (this of course means, "If you suck, I have an exit strategy in place. Don't blame me if this date is 13 minutes, Dude.")
What's more, if this new announcement from your man is coinciding with a new job or some specific new female relationship in his life - you have grounds to feel suspicious. For three years he didn't weigh in on who's been flirting with him. Why now? Unless your man got drastically hotter in the last few weeks - jaw reconstruction, calf implants - I'd say something is up.
Feel free to follow up with our readers and me as to what's transpired. As GI Joe and others on this panel have said before: Knowing is half the battle.
Good Luck.
From personal experience, it can also mean that you haven't been complementing him much lately, and this is his way of saying "Why aren't you paying attention to me anymore?"
I don't mind having to stroke his ego from time to time just to let him know that I still find him as sexy as ever, but if he's constantly telling me about the women that are suddenly flirting with him (and that just hasn't been part of his usual M.O.) then I'm naturally going to be suspicious. If all he needs is affirmation that I still find him attractive, I would hope he'd be smart enough to flirt with me instead and see what MY response is rather than playing with fire by provoking jealousy or suspicion. If he's suddenly so insecure that he needs to act out in this way or seek validation about his attractiveness from others outside the relationship, then as a couple we might have a communication issue that needs to be addressed properly.
Sometimes, I think it's nice to know that you've still "got it." When you've been with someone for a while, the compliments appear less and less frequently. If/When I get hit on, I tell me boyfriend because I think it's funny, and it kinda makes me feel good! It has nothing to do with any straying eyes on my part...
My friend always said that she would tell her bf that people hit on her b/c she wanted to see if he got jealous... she said that, if he was jealous, she would know he was still into her. I think THAT is ridiculous (and drama-inducing), but it's another perspective.
I agree, and in fact, my sweetie likes the occasional glance or compliment from other women, if its brief and not obvious. Likewise, I can appreciate the occasional compliment or even "checking out" of her by other dudes. Confirms to both of us we still "have it".
Yeah, the jealousy thing is silly, and playing with fire. It's one thing to step up when a dude's hitting on your woman in front of you, but to try to deliberately invoke jealousy, that's asking for TROUBLE!
Sounds like something's triggering this. Might be he feels, justified or not, you don't appreciate him or you aren't into him. But if he was planning to cheat, I don't think he would be going around telling you that. I'm guessing he needs reassurance and validation you still like him.
My supposition is that he tries to see how you react. I agree, he may feel that you're not that into him anymore, or you're not paying attention to him anymore. I know one of my male friend was acting this way to test his girlfriend because he felt like he was the last on her list. He thought that having her acting jealous would be a proof that she still loved him. I wouldn't say it is silly, but depending on the way it is said, it can be rather a desperate attempt to get attention and to get back to the flame of the first times, when compliments and love attentions couldn't be counted down. After 3 years, there might be too much routine in the relationships, and we sometimes forget that relationships are an everyday-work.
that's my thought.