Your boyfriend sounds like a chump. Not necessarily because of the situation, more how he handled it (like a grade-C chump). The fact that women regularly consent to giving men oral sex all over this great nation of ours is one of the only things that keeps America from falling to communism, and it should be greeted with joyous gratitude. Why, he should get down on his KNEES and...look you in the face? I digress.
Yeah, when we kiss you after you've given us head, it can taste like dick. So the hell what? It tastes like that because you just repeatedly stuffed his penis into your mouth. Anyone you give oral sex who responds by rejecting a romantic advance and equating you with disease DOES NOT DESERVE YOUR ORAL SEX.
Maybe it's an "I don't want to seem gay" thing? Although that doesn't really hold water when you're literally in the act of heterosexual sex at the time the argument arises. Plus it's your own penis, which is like calling masturbating gay. And if masturbating counted as being gay, Prop 8 would never even have made it on the ballot.
This guy sounds like he's got serious common decency issues, doesn't value the things you do for him, and may be a homophobe. Sure, I've assumed those things based on one side of a story summed up in two sentences, but I stand by it.
KICK HIM TO THE CURB, GURL. Or keep some breath mints by the bed. Either will work, really.
So it's gross for him to kiss you after your mouth has been on his dick, but it's not gross for your mouth to BE on his dick? He could get sick from kissing you after you've given him a BJ, but he's not concerned about you getting sick from giving him a BJ?
This is equal parts selfish and ridiculous, and the more I think about it, the angrier it makes me. I'm not trying to make the asker feel worse, but ugh- I can't imagine how I'd feel if my hypothetical boyfriend asked me daily for oral and then wouldn't even kiss me when it was over.
This is, unfortunately, soooo common. A lot of men are uncomfortable with kissing a woman who just gave them head. But, in my experience, usually only if he "went the distance" and you received the "payload". Don't know if it's a gay-issue thing or just the idea of consuming your own bodily fluids.
That being said, I know a lot of women who will not kiss their guy after he has gone down on them. Just not comfortable with it.
The "that's how people get sick" comment is off the wall. I would be asking him where he got that idea and as someone already stated, if that could make *him* sick, what the hell does he think it might do to YOU?
Some serious conversation needs to go on here. Either that, or kick him to the curb so some other woman can deal with his irrationality.
thanks for answering this. it's nice to know i wasn't totally in the wrong for being upset about it.
Dump that jerk- he sounds like an idiot and he asks you for oral sex "daily" ?!? I am sure you have things to do in your life besides give an ungrateful immature douchbag blissful wonderful oral sex daily. Find someone worthy.
thanks for answering this. it's nice to know i wasn't totally in the wrong for being upset about it.
i've heard guys do that but i never thought it was real. gosh. He's probably not comfortable with himself for him to think such a thing. I mean, my then bf always got a BJ & even after he came, he still tongue kissed me. Honestly, it's really retarded (for a lack of better word). This is like a guy going down on his girl & grossed out because he kisses her. He probably doesn't think he's clean, which means you tell him, you're nasty.
I'm a guy, and totally agree. As long as she doesn't currently have a mouthful of goo, there is no excuse. Once she spits or swallows, you're her man-bitch.
Swaim is like Plato. He would be like Plato if Plato were a blow job expert. Oh wait
my boyfriend kisses me after I give him oral... just a peck on the lips though. Definitely listen to Mr. Funny Guy and kick him to the curb. What he's doing is mean, especially if you two have been dating for a year.
Right? That's what got me. A whole year? Grow up, dude.
Maybe he's afraid he'll like the taste, and all that'd imply?
And I bet this A-hole regularly eats hotdogs on streetstands.
Sounds like he needs to cowgirl up.
flavored lube helps, it helps me deal with the texture and it helps my man when it comes to the after kisses and cuddles. win/win
The problem is that he's an a-hole. This is good enough reason to dump this loser. Seriously, don't put up with this kind of crap.
I can't see a single reason that doesn't include being a moron for not kissing a woman who's just been down on you, payload or no. As Swaim said, it's not like it's someone else's dick! What, he expects you to swallow, but it's too gross for him to go there after? Your guy needs to grow a pair.
I dated a girl for three years and she was very generous with oral, no complaints whatsoever. I was always grateful and pleased so of course I would kiss her after. I couldn't imagine how much it would have hurt or upset her to have denied her that. Plus that's like negative reinforcement: you give me head and I become less physically affectionate. After awhile she would have just stopped giving me head in favor of kissing me. Hell I'll kiss girls I'm not dating after they give me head, I'm not picky. Swaim said it best when he said "grow up dude." He needs to get over himself.
My ex and I had this issue, its kinda awkward to have your own fluids in your mouth... We just kept a bottle of water by the bed. It helps wash some of the fluids away.
I've always kissed my girl after she gave me head and she always swallowed! And She would always kiss me after I went down on her. It's a closeness that we share. Everyone is different, but I dont believe this guy should refuse her kiss. What a douche!
The "look her in the face" thing cracked me up. I'm sitting alone in the living room at 1:30 AM halfway gasping for air... my family must think I'm insane if I woke anyone up.
I had this issue with my ex, but then he started refusing to bathe and I started to get totally grossed out by the sight of black (grime-covered) body parts and refused to go near him unless he took a shower. So I had my reasons.
Stop sucking his cock, he's clearly too immature and ungrateful for such displays of affection. :x
Yeah, he basically likes you sucking on him with no strings attached afterward. This guy is BS-ing. He likes oral sex and that's all he likes. What a punk.
This is a silly question. How many girls have stuck a finger or their vibrators in their mouths after masturbating?? To each his own, but kissing after oral sex isn't a matter of politeness, decency, or even a "norm".
Well. I don't think it's unreasonable not to kiss someone after oral, because I personally think that's disgusting. However, I believe everyone's feelings should be talked about before sex of any kind. My disgust at oral led to keeping ice water, bowls of warm water and a fluffy towel nearby; the cleaning ritual became a part of the intimacy. Yes, I brush my teeth and use mouthwash as soon as it seems polite, but I don't just run away yelling about cooties (anymore, haha).
Still, I think this is massively unreasonable of him. First, he harassed you into having oral sex--every day--for a damn year. There are some people (who I don't agree with) who consider harassing a girl into having sex with you to be the same as rape, so if they saw this? Their shit would be flipped. Second, he didn't talk about his misgivings beforehand--if he had, maybe, instead, you could have had a lovely after-oral cuddle. Third, there is no scientific backing to "that's how people get sick," making it inherently unreasonable; but as has been stated, why is it acceptable for you to potentially "get sick"?
From all fifty-three words in this question, it is apparent to me that he does not value you, your thoughts, or your feelings. If he did, you wouldn't be in this situation. I think you should find a man to whom you are more than a hot, wet hole to stick things in.
My guy makes it a point to kiss me after I go down on him. Then give me a high five, a big hug and telling me he'll buy me that pony I've always wanted and I super duper nice. Yes, super duper. Then he takes me to the movies. I get my movies and meals paid for by him because I go down on him willingly and with gusto.
That, my friend, is a man.
That's what you need to hear. Not that bullshit for doing him a FAVOR.
I find it awkward to have him kiss me after his tongue has been exploring.... but if we had some water, I guess I wouldn't object.... just wipe your mouth.
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