There are no stupid questions. Only stupid comments. Well, okay, there are stupid questions, too. But yours isn't one of them.

Moving in with a lover/boyfriend/husband for the first time is a big deal, and you are wise to be wary -- not fearful or expecting the worst, but simply aware that there are adjustments you will both have to make. If compromise is a cornerstone of healthy relationships (it is), then living with someone takes the importance of flexibility to a whole new level. Every day you will be dealing with differences in the way you live -- some small, some big.

For example, what if he's a neat freak and you're a total slob? What if he likes to sleep in and you get up early? What if he wants to be with you every moment but you like having time to yourself? Then there are the household duties: who pays which bills? Who cooks? Who cleans? Who takes the day off work to wait at home for the cable guy? It's easy to say you'll share everything equally, but that can be a lot harder than it sounds.

If either of you has had roommates before, some of the adjustments will be old hat. Living with a lover is different, though. You aren't as independent of each other as you are with a roommate. If you get sick of a roommate or they piss you off, you can hide out in your room or leave for a few days. That doesn't really work with a lover, nor does stuff like labeling your groceries in the frig so he doesn't eat them or putting a lock on your closet door. You have a relationship to nurture, so the stakes are higher. You'll have to work together to solve problems that come up rather than saying, "Screw it, I'm getting a new roommate."

The intensity of your relationship will grow, too, which can be overwhelming at first. Even if you spend tons of time together already, living in the same house 24/7 and sharing a space puts a lot of pressure on the relationship and can take some getting used to. Prepare yourself for a lot of negotiation in the first few months. Learning to live with someone takes work.

So that's my advice to you: be ready and willing to negotiate and compromise, and prepare for some growing pains in your relationship. Also, think about how each of you can have your own space -- you'll need it. My wife and I have been together forever, but we both still have places in our home where we can go and be alone and decompress. It's healthy, and you'll want it. Separate bathrooms is a good start.

On the happy side, it's fun living with someone you love, and you'll enjoy making a home with your guy and sharing more time together, much of it naked. I hope things work out for you two exactly the way you hope.

Good luck.