An ideal question for today, isn't it? Not Christmas magic - I cheated and saved it from the 21st.
It is difficult. The baby, or the toddler, or the child take priority. Always. That is right and just and exactly as it should be, but it really, really cramps your style. Going out on a date more challenging than a walk in the park with the stroller becomes an exercise that they should use in Westpoint to teach the cadets logistics.
Some guys can't take it. Some gals can't take it either - the reverse happens too, though it is more usually guy with a child rather than a baby.
Now, not being able to take it doesn't make them shallow, vapid, self centered people who want all the attention for themselves. I see that sort of charge get thrown around too often as it is. It just means they are not ready.
Problem is, no one knows if they are ready or not until they try it.
So - go on dates. Be up front about the baby and the fact that the baby's needs are going to be the dominant factor in your dating for a fair while (the next 18 or so years). There will always be guys interested. You may as well have some fun too, right?
Merry Christmas.
My friend says that dating with her son is a lot easier, in the sense that it weeds out the d-bags. "Hit-it n' Quit-it" guys think twice when you dangle a kid in front of their face.
That said, she finally met her new beau in a more family-oriented setting... a children's program at the library.
Best of luck :)
St. Joseph did it :P Married her and everything. Though I'm sure you'll find a great guy who'll do it without a deity mandating it.
I love your answer on this MM! I dated someone with a kid and I couldn't take it because I'm still not ready (yes he told me has a kid and I still went ahead and gave it a try) and people kept slamming me for being selfish, immature, etc, etc, the list goes on.
If you aren't ready for a kid in the relationship, then you should definitely go for someone without otherwise there will be lots of problems that don't get any better. I've tried it for two years and in the end, I just couldn't hand it anymore. I thought if I could fake it till I made it, it would work but it didn't. You either accept it or you don't. And then from there, make your decision if the person and their kid is worth sticking it out in the end.
You aren’t immature. I’m older & didn’t want to date guys with small kids. If you don’t have one, it’s just not your thing. It’s that simple. Don’t sweat it.