That they're usually employed to make up for something awful, or by people in the throws of infatuation. That said, the few that are undertaken soberly, with focus and pure intent, are the stuff that makes life worth living. That and Dippin' Dots (Ice cream of the future!).
I used to be into grand gestures in a big way, which is how I scared off all of the girls I was interested in. Luckily, I was able to stalk one into submission over the course of the following two years. We were stuck in the same high school though, so I had a natural advantage. If I learned anything from that period, it's that the type of guy that whips out a big romantic gesture thinks of love the way I did at that time, and I was a complete tool.
After seeing a lot of what long-term relationships can offer, I've become a much stronger adherent to the "little just because gifts" school of romance. Do little things more frequently to let your partner know you're always thinking of them, or have at the very least set an alarm on your iPhone to remind you to pick up flowers twice a week.
Then when they least expects it, hit 'em with the big flashy gesture maybe once or twice a year. Any more than that and they start to see it coming. And really, what's the point of making your loved ones happy if you don't get to see them gag comically on a drink?
One of the grandest gestures I ever received was a Top 10 list from a guy about why he liked me. It didn't cost a thing except his time and it was funny, so it didn't feel too over the top or obsessive.
My guy is good with knowing when to give me adorable little tokens of affection that he knows I like. He can hand me a little koosh frog figurine and I'm sold!
Then again, he's also seriously considering not moving across country with me, but that's another question all together. (Hey Funny Guy, know any cute single men in the LA area?)
That's basically all there ARE in the LA area. Attractive single people walking around bumping into each others' abs. Your guy should be very afraid.
I take great comfort in this, Swaim. So much. See you (and all the cute single men) in September!
Sigh .. Funny Guy, you have a beautiful face, why mar it by posing as though you're suffering a stroke? You tool, you.
Sigh .. Funny Guy, you have a beautiful face, why mar it by posing as though you're suffering a stroke? You tool, you.
They took about a thousand pictures, and picked this-a one. I was not consulted. Although I have faith that my GS superiors have calculated exactly what silly face will help the most women open up, and it just happens to be "mid-stroke."
I really like your new picture! Especially the scruffy chin. It's really cute and manly at the same time. Not many people can do that eyebrow lift, either.
It makes ME want to open up, anyway. Like I would to a friend.
My friend has what she likes to call the "chocolates in the rain" theory. She named it after a guy who one of her friends was dating- after they'd been going out for about two days, she walked out of her classroom building to find him waiting for her. In the rain. Holding a box of chocolates. He had looked up her schedule and figured out where she would be for class, and then waited outside for her to exit the building. In the rain. Holding a box of chocolates.
The idea is that a grand romantic gesture coming from someone you know and love can be awesome, but when it comes from someone you barely know then it just comes off creepy. (Like, really creepy.) The maximum level of grandness of any romantic gesture should be directly proportionate to the seriousness of your relationship, I guess.
So how do you get your boyfriend to do something like this. He did at the beginning...
Oh, and I love your picture. Show's your personality.
Most grand romantic gestures are poorly thought-out, and usually serve the purpose of making the gesturer feel like a romantic hero in his own mind, with little thought as to how they would actually affect the gesturee (as much as I love Lloyd Dobbler, if someone held a boom box outside my bedroom window while I was trying to sleep, I'd throw rocks at them).
That said, I agree with SmR, in that, the better you know someone, the more likely you are to accurately predict what they will find romantic, what they will find annoying, and what they will find just plain creepy, so long-term partners (who don't have to resort to stalking-practices to know your schedule) are better off doing this sort of thing than new crushes.
Mmm. Lloyd Dobler... If the right person woke me up to "In Your Eyes," I think I'd be okay with it.
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