No, unless he was thinking of cheating anyway, or a series of unlikely circumstances provides an opportunity to cheat that, at the time, seems "too perfect" to pass up (which is a sham, because the emotional fallout is never worth it, unless you're literally a sociopath and have no functioning guilt gland).
Most people will tell you that the reason guys cheat is because they like sex. And while it's true that I would soberly consider jamming my hand into a wood chipper if it meant I could press a button and get laid whenever I want (it'd have to be my off-hand, so I could still masturbate), I'm going to dissent. Men don't cheat because they love sex so much. They cheat because they don't like the relationship they're in AS MUCH AS they like having sex.
That might seem like splitting hairs, but it makes a big difference. Say your guy is a sex-crazed wild man. That's fine. If he's happy with the thing you've got going, and his needs are fairly met, he's unlikely to stray. There are exceptions, of course--I mean, it's hard to define "happy in a relationship" very concretely--but there's no reason a guy who is bananas about sex can't carry on a full, loving, committed relationship.
On the other hand, I've known of plenty of dudes who aren't particularly ladies' men that cheat as a way to end a current relationship they aren't happy with, or to feel like they've got power in the relationship, or because they were too boneheaded or cowardly to get themselves out of a flirtatious situation.
There's no way to guarantee your significant other's going to behave themselves (although shock collars are somewhat effective). But your best bet is by being open with him, communicating your needs and maintaining a genuine interest in his, and making sure you're both getting what you need out of this relationship. Arguing is fine, as long as it's mostly the result of working through issues together, and not just childish bickering about who called who what or who ran over whose mother with the riding mower.
That way he doesn't "need" to go outside the relationship for sex, and if he does, you know fer damn sure he just did it because he's an asshole (or has weird Mommy issues, and either way you need to book it).
"That way he doesn't "need" to go outside the relationship for sex, and if he does, you know fer damn sure he just did it because he's an asshole"
I disagree with you Michael. Unless the person has a true sex addiction or just extremely immature- both parties are responsible for cheating. Arguing constantly with your mate is no fun at all- and while it is no excuse for your partner to cheat- you have a hand in that.
Get counseling- it isn't healthy to be arguing all the time.
I disagree with phoenixxx, we see real life couples and ones on TV who argue/bicker all the time but love the crap out of each other (I like to think that's me and my bf) and wouldn't stray. IMO I always felt a man OR A WOMAN would/could cheat if they weren't getting something they really needed in their current relationship such as quality time, someone to listen to them, words of affirmation (basically their love tank is empty as it's described in the awesome book The Five Love Languages--a must read!)
For guys it seems like stats show it's more physical, and for female the straying is due to more emotional reasons...but if you're guy is willing to have sex with other women, but not you...to me that's a big problem and he should be dumped fast.
Relationships AREN'T EASY, and I think it's dumb when people think arguing is the instant downfall of a relationship. To me, one where there's no arguing isn't natural. If the guy is not willing to work on the relationship and it's easier for them to just bail (via cheating) then he's a douche.
I WOULD NOT ever blame the other person for my cheating...I can't stand it when ppl use that lame line, "well if you had been handling your business with your man..." and ppl always want to say it's the woman's fault for the man straying. How unfair is that? The problem is with the person who strays and didn't have the balls to break it off before they did that.
I made the mistake of getting into a relationship with someone who had a rich history wanting sex, all the time. I knew he was like that before we got into the relationship, and he knew that I was the exact opposite (keeping it saved), but he said he wanted to change his ways and wanted something more from a relationship. Everything was great for a year and a half - before, low and behold, he cheated. I had to learn the hard way that men don't change.
When did "he cheated on me" become the same as "he broke up with me"? If you're arguing too much, and he doesn't like you anymore, he should break up with you- or you with him. Yeah, maybe it's half your fault if he broke up with you...it's rarely completely one sided in relationships. But...is it your fault if he decides to hump someone else rather than actually break up with you first? No. You could give him all the sex he could handle, and he would still cheat on you because some guys are just like that. Some girls are just like that, too. Just like some people will kick the crap out of you if you burn the pot roast- there aren't quite as many people willing to blame the victim in that situation, however.
how do you burn pot roast?
Im in a Long Disstance Relationship, and we went 10 days without webcam and hardly spoke on the phone, most of the time we argued as he was always telling me he was busy and then his friend came over for the weekend and they went out.. i didnt hear from him at all.. he then wrote to me to tell me he does remember what happened but didnt cheat on me... yet since that happened he has withdrawn emotionally from me, he has become defensive and irratable.. and my gut is telling me something happened.. when i asked him this.. he became angry and tells me its because i wasnt suportive enough of him when he was busy and the fact we argued alot thats why he is acting the way he is now.. Im not sure what to believe.. im flying half across the world to see him next month and need to know now.. how can i ask him and get him to honestly tell me before i spend alot of my money and time on someone i love if they dont love me back?
I was in a long distance relationship too for almost 4 yrs and ur partners reaction is sending some serious "Red Flags” The reason we broke off our relationship was because overnight he got extremely busy to even send a text and this went on for weeks which i found to be strange considering the fact that we spoke every day; I knew something was up. But if u think u need to go there and sort out this issue face to face i would say its best that you do that way if he did in fact cheat you can close the chapter and prepare to move on and if he did not (which i really hope) you n kiss and make up while working throw the issue at hand. I think either way it’s doing the right thing for you.
Good Luck