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Mystery Man

 
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why do men think its ok to leave there girlfriend and go on a hunting trip he does not understand i dont like being alone how do i get him to see this

It's weird how it goes. There were about a dozen questions today on this type of topic.

Why doesn't he answer texts or calls straight away sometimes, why does he ignore me sometimes, how dare he have any interests outside of me!

Would all of you just grow up, please!

Do you really want his full, undivided attention, 24/7?
Him to respond instantly to you at any time of the day or night?
For him to give up everything he enjoys for you?
Subordinate his life to yours?

Turn that around for a second. If he demanded that of you, you'd be here asking what to do about an over controlling boyfriend that doesn't give you any personal space at all. That seems to be the second most favorite type of question I get.

So, you don't like to be alone. Who does? Well, actually most people like and need a bit of me time now and again. I assume you were alone before meeting this guy, unless you are a jumper. Why not take the time he is on his hunting trip to reconnect with friends, pamper yourself a little, go on a trip of your own?

All guys have other interests than their gal, that sometimes they want to focus on. All gals have other interests than their guy. It is normal, and a healthy relationship balances them out. It is part of the give and take thing that is vital to keep a good relationship going. When either side gets needy, clingy and overly demanding, it is usually a sign that the relationship has problems and is heading towards failure.

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16 Comments

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These kind of questions are highly disturbing to me. It paints an awful picture of women and what they require out of a relationship. Guys seem to EXPECT this behavior from me now, and nothing could be farther from the truth. I hate texting and phone calls, and keep such methods of communication as short and to the point as possible. I also like my space, because I have things I like to do by myself or quiet time to write and read. And then me and my guy can go play WoW or watch Office Space. Is that so much to ask for?

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I completely agree. Get a hobby, find something you enjoy doing, and HELP HIM PACK. I am now married with children and hardly ever have time by myself. I love my family dearly. I love my alone time also.

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My only hope is the girl is well under the age of 25. Otherwise it's pretty scary she would have to ask that question.

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Not just that, but I'd be willing to bet that IF she had a guy that was at her every beck and call and was there for her 24/7 she'd very quickly lose interest.

Mystery Man

Got to admit - I'd rather people asked before messing their life up by having unreasonable expectations.

OK - the repetition can be annoying - I counted up, and out of the last 300 questions just to me, just over 150 were about this sort of problem.

But, that is what we are here for.

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From an asker....I think some women are too clingy and have the expectation set too high, I'll give you that. However, I think that if you are in a new relationship and live 2 miles apart, then you should see each other at least once a week. That's not too much. Yet, the guy just calls or texts and dosen't make plans. He intiates contact and answers his phone when he is with friends.Explain that. I'm getting fed up.

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Ah.

You got a shy, unconfident one. He wants you to be equally invested in it by you suggesting where to meet up etc. Maybe he got dumped for being too controlling in the past. Guys can learn, if you hit them over the head hard enough!

Of course, he could have a harem and not care - but that is unlikely.

rxy

oh for gods sake GROW UP! I am sure are a mature adult who can stand stay by herself for a weekend or something? What did you ever do before you had a boyfriend? I have a few suggestions for you...

1) while you are "alone" learn something, read a book, go to a movie etc
2) meet up with all the friends you apparently abandoned since you got with your boyfriend
3) ENTERTAIN YOURSELF!
4) learn to live with yourself!

arghhhhh this makes me exasperated!

Margaret Schmidt

5) Discover the wonders of punctuation.

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Ahahahahahaha. Thank you for that.

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The woman who asked this question is the reason all guys think girls are dramatic and too clingy. people in a relationship don't stop being their own person with their own life and they shouldn't! that would be a recipe for a bad relationship. I was watching that bridezilla show and OMG those woman are so awful i can't see any of those marriages working out. the woman on that show give us a bad name as well. Not every woman has to have everything her way. its called compromise people!

Katie

Women like this are the reason my boyfriend appreciates my rather independent nature so much more. I still think he's worried someday I'll drastically change and become dependent and clingy.
It makes me sad to see people who sacrifice all of their own life for someone else, and expect their partner to do the same.

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If she does not heed this advice, I imagine her on the floor turn a light on and off.

Mystery Man

Ouch.

That image gives me the creeps.

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