I can't say, because I think flirting is a subjective call. Some people would consider "attentive and complimentary" to be flirting; others don't think it's flirting until a guy starts touching you or asking you out. I think that if you have to ask, he probably wasn't flirting. All I'm hearing in your description is a guy being nice to a woman who was willing to listen to him. Yes, he might find you attractive, but that's a long way from being ready to cheat on his wife with you.
On the other hand, I wasn't there, and I'm a big believer in gut feelings. Doesn't sound like you had one of those, though.
Based on what you've said, he sounds harmless to me. It would be unfair of you to rush to judgment and assume he has ulterior motives when you are unsure. This is yet another situation where I think it's best to give someone the benefit of the doubt until he proves you wrong.
I say be nice to Mr. Soul-Searcher Guy. He sees you as a friend now. If he is trying to make a move on you, you'll know it soon enough. Then you can kick him in the gumdrops (figuratively speaking, of course.)
Thanks for the question.
Why do you care?
If it was me, I wouldn't want to get caught in a "love triangle." But even if it doesn't go that far, there's that gray area where someone who's taken is friendly and I know I would wonder if it was "too friendly" and whether the guy was a jerk or not. Whether I wanted to continue to be so friendly with him or not.
Thanks for the answer! My gut feeling at the time was he was being more than friendly. We're colleagues but this was the first time we'd socialised. He knew everyone else there but spent the whole night with me. I think that was noted. But either way you're right Cary - it's fair to give him the benefit of the doubt.
As for why do I care? Honestly, because I was flattered by his attention but instantly felt bad about that because he's taken. I would never let anything happen and want that to be clear.
Glad to help. Hope it does. Thanks.