Is anyone really surprised by this whole Arnold Schwarzenegger love child thing? When it was announced that the Governator and Maria Shriver split, I wasn't surprised. And now that it's been revealed that Arnold fathered a child with his longtime housekeeper, I'm not all that shocked.
Arnold has always been a sleaze. Anyone who has ever listened to the Conan the Barbarian commentary track where he makes lewd comments about every female cast member can attest to that. Remember the allegations that he groped female members of his staff? Or when he talked about the drug and sex orgies he used to engage in during his bodybuilding days? The amazing thing is that the whole illegitimate child thing didn't come out while he was running Cawl-i-fornia.
Still, you have to feel bad for Shriver. (That Kennedy curse strikes again!) Cheating is bad enough. (My guess is that Maria knew he cheated.) But to have a 13-year-old son (who was born only a few days after his fourth son with Maria, no less) that you've kept hidden from your wife is a whole other level of betrayal. At least Shriver will get the last laugh, between ripping Arnold on the final Oprah episode and hiring a top Hollywood divorce lawyer.
Now that Arnie is headed back to the big screen, I thought I'd offer some new catchphrases suited to his current scandal. Read them in your best Ah-nuld voice, and feel free to share yours in the comments.
"Who is your daddy and what does he do? Oh, your daddy is me? Uh, gotta go!"
"I'll be back...in thirteen years to pay child support."
"I am the Impregnator-800. I must put da baby in you in order to save da future."
"Ice to see you, Batman. Could you recommend a good divorce lawyer?"
"I will terminate you. I'm talking to da baby in your stomach."
"I'm Quaid! Douglas Quaid. It's not my kid. Who is this Arnold Schwarzenegger guy?"
"Hasta la vista, illegitimate baby."
"Hey, at least it's not twins. Right? Like the movie with me and Danny Devito?"
"Crush your enemies, see them driven before you, and hear the lamentations of the women whom you knocked up and paid to keep quiet."
"It's not a too-mah. Dat's my baby in da maid's belly, honey."
What do you think about the Schwarzenegger love child scandal? Will you see another Arnie movie?
Arnold has always been a sleaze. Anyone who has ever listened to the Conan the Barbarian commentary track where he makes lewd comments about every female cast member can attest to that. Remember the allegations that he groped female members of his staff? Or when he talked about the drug and sex orgies he used to engage in during his bodybuilding days? The amazing thing is that the whole illegitimate child thing didn't come out while he was running Cawl-i-fornia.
Still, you have to feel bad for Shriver. (That Kennedy curse strikes again!) Cheating is bad enough. (My guess is that Maria knew he cheated.) But to have a 13-year-old son (who was born only a few days after his fourth son with Maria, no less) that you've kept hidden from your wife is a whole other level of betrayal. At least Shriver will get the last laugh, between ripping Arnold on the final Oprah episode and hiring a top Hollywood divorce lawyer.
Now that Arnie is headed back to the big screen, I thought I'd offer some new catchphrases suited to his current scandal. Read them in your best Ah-nuld voice, and feel free to share yours in the comments.
"Who is your daddy and what does he do? Oh, your daddy is me? Uh, gotta go!"
"I'll be back...in thirteen years to pay child support."
"I am the Impregnator-800. I must put da baby in you in order to save da future."
"Ice to see you, Batman. Could you recommend a good divorce lawyer?"
"I will terminate you. I'm talking to da baby in your stomach."
"I'm Quaid! Douglas Quaid. It's not my kid. Who is this Arnold Schwarzenegger guy?"
"Hasta la vista, illegitimate baby."
"Hey, at least it's not twins. Right? Like the movie with me and Danny Devito?"
"Crush your enemies, see them driven before you, and hear the lamentations of the women whom you knocked up and paid to keep quiet."
"It's not a too-mah. Dat's my baby in da maid's belly, honey."
What do you think about the Schwarzenegger love child scandal? Will you see another Arnie movie?
Fathering this child will probably prevent him from being cast in Sex and the City 3, but if he wants to play a robot from the future who comes to terminate people, I think his audience will forgive him and buy tickets. His image is that of a big macho stud, not a girly man. He stayed married for 25 years, which is like 150 years for a non-Hollywood marriage. The most amazing thing about this story is that Obama and the Democrats are portraying themselves as the party of prudes at a time when 45 percent of children are born out of wedlock.
Oh please. This is not a political issue; it's a moral issue. Jerks come in all varieties.
That said, I bet Bill Clinton is enjoying this. I hope so.
"Hasta la vista, illegitimate baby." Excellent.
oh my goodness everybody and their mom has affairs now a days. it's not right for anybody to be doing it but it's ridiculous how much pressure put on celebrities to be perfect.
Pressure, schmessure. Arnold's a douche / borderline manwhore, plain and simple. What astonishes me is how he could cheat on beautiful Maria- and with his housekeeper!!
I've heard quotes of him admitting that he screwed his opponents over when he was bodybuilding. They would come to him for advice, and he would give them advice that he knew would cause them to lose. Silly Arnold.