Here are some things Marie Claire blogger Rich Santos freely admits: he loves to cuddle, chase younger women, and is totally clueless when it comes to dating. He's been writing the popular and oftentimes controversial Sex and the Single Guy column since 2007, and every week he bravely overshares, revealing what it's like to be an average dude navigating New York City's notorious dating scene. Rich had plenty of great advice for us here at Guyspeak about writing from the male perspective for a female audience.

Guyspeak: Help us out: what's the one piece of advice that women hate to hear?

Rich: People love to solicit love advice; they just don't like to follow it. I find that the piece of advice that  most people hate to hear is that they should walk away from something because someone is not into them.

What's the difference between writing for women and dealing with them in the wild?

I write a lot of what really goes on in my head. When I'm out hitting on girls, I have more of a protective persona-- they don't know I actually like to cuddle, for instance, until I've been dating them for a while. But at first I am more of a "party guy" that doesn't reveal what's below the surface. But the writing in my blog is all that exists below the surface.

All that insecurity comes out in my writing...but I have to look extremely secure when I'm out. And, those insecurities don't come out until I've dated someone for a while...when it's too late for them to take off because I'm such a damaged freak.

Damaged? Don't women love that? Vulnerability and all that poppycock...

I have been working on letting my vulnerabilities out slowly.. I used to go out and say it all in one fifteen minute meeting: "I dont enjoy sex, I was afraid I was gay back in the day..." So, if I'm talking to a random girl, I better not unload all of that on her. I like the vulnerability to be a pleasant surprise later on.

So, as "party guy" then, how to do hit on/introduce/lay the love smackdown on a woman you just met?

The best pickup line I've ever used was when this girl was talking about how she was coming to New York to do fashion. I said: "You'll never make it in New York..." Challenge! The next day I was added on Facebook and we made out a few weeks later. I don't know how being a jerk like that worked-- well we all know that works.

Women say they want nice guys, but they really want jerks...

Totally. Or, they want to turn a jerk into a nice guy. Maybe that's what it is. We all want a challenge. Maybe jerks are just more challenging and intriguing.

What challenges you?

Younger girls challenge me.  And women that aren't interested in me or are unavailable or just seem tough to get to for some reason. Limited accessibility is so hot. I feel "VIP" when I'm with her. Basically a girl I chase is challenging. A girl that chases me is not

Have you encountered any women out there who have read your stuff?

I have-- most of the women that I speak to through email or Facebook either give me advice or ask for advice. Most of the stuff is positive. I've gotten in trouble for a "boobs" post i wrote up. It's probably not good to discuss body parts. I love hearing from readers though. It's the best when someone says something I wrote helped them or changed their life in a positive way because it shifted their thinking.

What's something your readers would be surprised to find out about you

Hmm, I've already admitted I'm anxiety ridden, a total geek, and clueless with women. Perhaps it would be that music makes me cry sometimes.

Okay, so, Guyspeak just launched. It's five of normal, real guys giving advice to normal, real women. Any advice for the advice givers?

The one thing I've learned to do (and its' taken like two years), is learning how to write so that women take my advice seriously. At first I blogged firing on all cylinders, talking about how I would pick up women, etc. That boobs post actually taught me a lot. I didn't intend to offend anyone. but there were comments saying people like me caused eating disorders. It forced me to take a step back and remember that I wasn't talking to my "buddies by the flat screen on NFL Sunday".  I've learned to be more tactful.