What are important questions? Well, things about their current life and employment, if they have any children, do they like their parents, are they your sibling, etc.
Wait...what? Are you my sibling?
Yes. And do you know why? Well because nowadays it seems like more and more women are having kids thru the use of sperm donors and apparently some sperm donors are popular enough to be the parents of 150 children. Imagine THAT child support check!
Today there are 150 children, all conceived with sperm from one donor, in this group of half siblings, and more are on the way. "It's wild when we see them all together -- they all look alike," said Ms. Daily, 48, a social worker in the Washington area who sometimes vacations with other families in her son's group.
As more women choose to have babies on their own, and the number of children born through artificial insemination increases, outsize groups of donor siblings are starting to appear. While Ms. Daily's group is among the largest, many others comprising 50 or more half siblings are cropping up on Web sites and in chat groups, where sperm donors are tagged with unique identifying numbers.
In some ways, that particular donor is the motherlovin' man. In other ways, that's the most scary and strange story I've read in quite some time. There really ought to be some kind of law against this. How would that even come up until it's too late? Here's some more scary stuff.
Some experts are even calling attention to the increased odds of accidental incest between half sisters and half brothers, who often live close to one another.
Well, alright.
Dating is already scary enough worrying about STDs and committing to the wrong person. Now you have to worry about if you're dating an actual sibling? Egads. I think its ethically and scientifically irresponsible to even let something like that happen. But I see how it can. Good specimen are just that. I have no idea how you pick a donor, but it seems like you flip through a book and pick out the ones with the qualities you want. Of course everybody's going to go for the best qualities.
The article mentioned that some places have a cap of 25 "donations". But even that sounds outwardly ridiculous.
What I find most interesting is the difference between a man with 150 children that he's not on the hook for merely because he donated and a deadbeat father who has three children he rarely sees because he slept with a particular woman. I understand that signature makes the difference and because technically the woman is making the choice without the help of another person to get pregnant, but something just isn't adding up to me. I'll have to think more on that but something just...doens't seem right. One gets to be a deadbeat and the other was just some anonymous guy who dropped off some sperm one day to help some woman get a kid. Same result, different outcomes.
Anyway, what do you think about this story? Freaky isn't it? Should there be a cap on how many donations came come from a single chap? Has anybody ever dated a donor baby??
This seems absolutely crazy but when you hear about it, it seems like such an obvious logic flaw! Absolutely wild.
What happens when that outstanding specimen has children of his own. If you're a dinar baby you can ask someone if they are too and compare numbers, but you can't compare your number to your dates daddy's name.
WOW...dating is hard enough and now this. YIKES. People are now turning to robots for mates now too. Human relationships get more complicated every decade.
This wouldn't be as bad if we knew for certain those high donors were Nobel laureates or entrepreneur types. But alas, given our society's superficiality, probably based strictly on looks, which as the NY Times article mentions, having good looks does not preclude genetic disorders.
But hey, though we might lose our science lead, our entrepreneurial advantage, to other countries, but at least we'll have lots of sexy people now! Well, at least some of them will be sexy, if an extensive British study done turns out to be right...
Dude it's not fully proven whether intelligence is inherited (read on the nature vs nurture of intelligence) Also suppose the woman who wanted sperm donation from a handsome/athletic man, was highly intellectual. Therefore she wanted a good looking child whom she could nurture into a very brainy kid! Don't judge as you don't how the process of choice works out.
LOL woman I've been reading and studying the "nature vs nurture" debate long long before you were ever born. Well, we call it environment versus hereditary since neither the scientists I read on nor myself mind big words. For that matter, not a single of the Nobel caliber women I know would even consider looks as top criteria, if they were to take sperm, they look for lack of genetic disorders as their top priority.
In any case, unless the woman is attractive, her sons will not be, regardless of the attractiveness of the father. A British study, involving over 10,000 subjects from around the world, on six continents, demonstrated, convincingly, overwhelmingly, that a man's attractiveness comes strictly his mom's attractiveness. Didn't matter the father's attractiveness one bit; a hot mom with an ugly dad always had hot sons, a hot dad with an ugly mom always had ugly sons. For daughters, parental attraction plays a far lesser role, in some cases, when both parents rated ugly still produced an attractive daughter.
Um, most sperm banks require disclosure of genetic and heritable conditions, some even test for them. The fact that the article states they are worried about them tells me, its the women, not me, being shallow, thank you.
That's why we women rule the world. LOL
Wahaha point taken Faye! :P
Rephrasing nature and nurture well that must be the knowledge you've been gathering before I was even born. Furthermore one research doesn't conclude anything.
Well one way to avoid the awkwardness of asking questions which point towards you inquiring about the dates parents, hence appearing odd. Is to simple asking your father if he has ever donated his sperm, he might think 'what the heck', but once you explain your fear of incest he should more than happy to cough the info.
I'm not a donation baby but I had a similar problem. when I was a month old, my father died. he had 2 sons before me with 2 other women. my mom had never met them, and didn't know much about them besides first names. well this wasn't an issue seeing as we lived in different parts of canada.. until I moved to another province.
I had always known about my brothers (one was 8 years older, one 5 older) but I didn't know they lived in the city i moved too! I was 19, a single mom and dating! this posed anxiety about the possiblity of dating my own brother or even further down the line, one of my kids dating a cousin!
well luckily I did end up tracking them both down after 2 years. I now have 2 neices and I at least know I'm not going to be dating a sibling (unless my father sired more that even we don't know about and never will). but It was certainly nerve wracking everytime i met someone with their names (and naturally they were common names).
I can't imagine having that chat with only a NUMBER to compare and not a name.
"I'll have to think more on that but something just...doens't seem right. One gets to be a deadbeat and the other was just some anonymous guy who dropped off some sperm one day to help some woman get a kid."
I am a donor baby. My parents wouldn't have been able to have children without a donor, and they chose that method rather than adopting. The difference is that my father, while not biological, was there for me. I didn't need this donor to be my father figure, all I needed was his biological donation.
The difference is that a deadbeat father is supposed to be a father, but he does a crap job. A donor only gives the gift of life, in the assumption that the receiving mother can supply their own father figure (if they choose to) to the child.
"I'll have to think more on that but something just...doens't seem right. One gets to be a deadbeat and the other was just some anonymous guy who dropped off some sperm one day to help some woman get a kid. Same result, different outcomes."
I am a donor baby, and without my donor my parents wouldn't have been able to have me. My father was grateful to be given the chance to be a father. That's where the difference is. A deadbeat father creates children which are his, biologically and lawfully, and doesn't do a good job looking after them. A donor creates children which are his biologically, but are technically adopted by the receiving parents.
I have personally never met a half-sibling fathered by my donor... I would be afraid that the siblings I was raised with would be jealous. (After I was born, all of a sudden my siblings were conceived... odd since they were infertile for years before)
"I'll have to think more on that but something just...doens't seem right. One gets to be a deadbeat and the other was just some anonymous guy who dropped off some sperm one day to help some woman get a kid. Same result, different outcomes."
I am a donor baby, and without my donor my parents wouldn't have been able to have me. My father was grateful to be given the chance to be a father. That's where the difference is. A deadbeat father creates children which are his, biologically and lawfully, and doesn't do a good job looking after them. A donor creates children which are his biologically, but are technically adopted by the receiving parents.
I have personally never met a half-sibling fathered by my donor... I would be afraid that the siblings I was raised with would be jealous. (After I was born, all of a sudden my siblings were conceived... odd since they were infertile for years before)
"I'll have to think more on that but something just...doens't seem right. One gets to be a deadbeat and the other was just some anonymous guy who dropped off some sperm one day to help some woman get a kid. Same result, different outcomes."
I am a donor baby, and without my donor my parents wouldn't have been able to have me. My father was grateful to be given the chance to be a father. That's where the difference is. A deadbeat father creates children which are his, biologically and lawfully, and doesn't do a good job looking after them. A donor creates children which are his biologically, but are technically adopted by the receiving parents.
I have personally never met a half-sibling fathered by my donor... I would be afraid that the siblings I was raised with would be jealous. (After I was born, all of a sudden my siblings were conceived... odd since they were infertile for years before)