Oh Braxtons, how do I love thee? Let me count the ways. I seriously counted at least ten acts of transgression for which Evelyn - the Braxton sisters' mother - should slap the entire piss out of them for on last night's episode of Braxton Family Values (WEtv, 9 P.M.).
Because I don't think she gets enough love in general, let me say how much I love their mother. She gives me life in a non-Perez Hilton kind of way. She's got a gang of successful, somewhat stable, attractive daughters and her own life that she's tending to. She does her best to keep her family afloat which is no small feat considering the personalities involved. And for the most part, those sisters clearly love and adore one another (and their mother) and act like they have some sense.
Except Tamar.
But even Tamar shows flashes of makesensery on occasion. But last night...oooooh last night. If I was Evelyn I'd have wanted to slap the piss out of everybody. Why?
Glad you asked.
Here's a list of reasons why:
1. Tamar is such a hot mess that I had my homegirl watch the show for the first time and her reaction to Tamar after seeing her for THIRTY SECONDS was "what's wrong with her?" and "she ain't right. She's like this all the time??" After I informed her that she was indeed a flaming hot mess 24/7 my friend merely said, "she's too much and she clearly never thinks she's wrong."
2. More specifically, Tamar for thinking that ANYBODY owed her an apology for "how they feel". What does that mean exactly anyway? Evelyn, get your mits ready. Tamar actually asked Toni to apologize for how she felt. Namaste.
3. Toni needs to be slapped for them curlers she had on during that deep family conversation. From what I could tell they had all come from the restaurant where they made a damn fool of themselves so how come everybody was still dressed and Toni managed to get all comfy and ROLL her hair? Evelyn...get the gloves oiled up.
4. Toni also needs to have the piss slapped out of her for getting into an argument she could never win. Nobody wins in an argument with Tamar, they just give up. You can't have a discussion with somebody who never sees how they could be doing wrong and who's got a "why are you all picking on me" chip on her shoulder at all times. They looked like 5-year-olds going back and forth in the restaurant...which brings us to...
5. Trina. Oh, my love Trina. I can't BELIEVE you all had that convo about you slobbing some man's knob IN FRONT OF YOUR MOTHER. That liquor got her real free because she just let loose. Bad language and giving your mother a rundown on your torrid sexual deviance? Look, I have no problem with folks getting head. And talking about it. Whoopty do. But in front of your mama? Of course, that is also Tamar's fault for bringing it up in the first place and then not understanding why Toni said she should cork that. Word up, I can't handle Tamar at all. But Trina...my love Trina. You need the piss slapped out of you.
6. Traci...come on down. Now let me get this straight, you spent all your time wanting to do a Braxton Family album because you missed your chance before. THEN when your sisters are like, "let's do it" you balk because you don't want them thinking you will just drop what you're doing. Put on your big girl panties woman and handle your business.Get out your feelings. Evelyn...ready, set, go.
7. Towanda really ain't do nothing to get the piss slapped out of her, but those are her sisters and she's the responsible one that didn't keep them girls in line. Towanda, take your place at the front of the line for Evelyn's hands of gloom. And last but not least...
8. Evelyn. Say what? Yep, Evelyn needs to slap herself for wanting to get in on their album and sing some hymns or something or other. Say what? Let it go, boom boom. Let it go.
Except Tamar.
But even Tamar shows flashes of makesensery on occasion. But last night...oooooh last night. If I was Evelyn I'd have wanted to slap the piss out of everybody. Why?
Glad you asked.
Here's a list of reasons why:
1. Tamar is such a hot mess that I had my homegirl watch the show for the first time and her reaction to Tamar after seeing her for THIRTY SECONDS was "what's wrong with her?" and "she ain't right. She's like this all the time??" After I informed her that she was indeed a flaming hot mess 24/7 my friend merely said, "she's too much and she clearly never thinks she's wrong."
2. More specifically, Tamar for thinking that ANYBODY owed her an apology for "how they feel". What does that mean exactly anyway? Evelyn, get your mits ready. Tamar actually asked Toni to apologize for how she felt. Namaste.
3. Toni needs to be slapped for them curlers she had on during that deep family conversation. From what I could tell they had all come from the restaurant where they made a damn fool of themselves so how come everybody was still dressed and Toni managed to get all comfy and ROLL her hair? Evelyn...get the gloves oiled up.
4. Toni also needs to have the piss slapped out of her for getting into an argument she could never win. Nobody wins in an argument with Tamar, they just give up. You can't have a discussion with somebody who never sees how they could be doing wrong and who's got a "why are you all picking on me" chip on her shoulder at all times. They looked like 5-year-olds going back and forth in the restaurant...which brings us to...
5. Trina. Oh, my love Trina. I can't BELIEVE you all had that convo about you slobbing some man's knob IN FRONT OF YOUR MOTHER. That liquor got her real free because she just let loose. Bad language and giving your mother a rundown on your torrid sexual deviance? Look, I have no problem with folks getting head. And talking about it. Whoopty do. But in front of your mama? Of course, that is also Tamar's fault for bringing it up in the first place and then not understanding why Toni said she should cork that. Word up, I can't handle Tamar at all. But Trina...my love Trina. You need the piss slapped out of you.
6. Traci...come on down. Now let me get this straight, you spent all your time wanting to do a Braxton Family album because you missed your chance before. THEN when your sisters are like, "let's do it" you balk because you don't want them thinking you will just drop what you're doing. Put on your big girl panties woman and handle your business.Get out your feelings. Evelyn...ready, set, go.
7. Towanda really ain't do nothing to get the piss slapped out of her, but those are her sisters and she's the responsible one that didn't keep them girls in line. Towanda, take your place at the front of the line for Evelyn's hands of gloom. And last but not least...
8. Evelyn. Say what? Yep, Evelyn needs to slap herself for wanting to get in on their album and sing some hymns or something or other. Say what? Let it go, boom boom. Let it go.
You hit the nail on the head on every situation on yesterday's episode. They all were a mess and needed someone to reign them in. I can't believe they acted like that in the restuarant.
I have heard it said more than once that Toni is jealous of Tamar so can some tell me:
1. How many platinum and gold albums does Tamar have?
2. How many times has Tamar had top billing in a Broadway Hit?
3. How long was Tamar's one woman show on the Las Vegas strip?
4. How many Grammys, American Music Awards, and/or American Billboard Awards does Tamar have?
5. How many times has Tmara (as a solo artist) performed live on the Grammys, American Music Awards, BET Awards show, and NAACP awards?
6. What music Hall of Fame was Tamar admitted to?
7. How many successful solo or group albums or songs has Tamar recorded?
8. How many worldwide sports tours (i.e. FIFA Cup) has Tamar performed at in front of over 100,000 people and broadcast live to over 200 nations? Has she ever performed at a major international event?
9. How many songs has Tamar recorded that made it to the Billboard Top 100?
10. How many time has Tamar had top billing for a national concert tour?
11. How many movies has Tamar been in?
Oh an the idea that Toni doesn't want to share the spotlight. Look at interviews, video out-takes, articles, and cd jackets from the peak years of Toni's career and guess who you find in the spotlight with Toni -- TAMAR. Tamar should tell the truth about how Toni allowed her to ride shoot gun through the best years of her career. If Tamar didn't want to be known as Toni's little sister she should have said so in the peak years. When Toni was on Oprah she did have a problem being "Toni little sister". This mess is like one of the Wayne’s accusing Keenan of being jealous of their success. This is like Charlie Murphy saying Eddie Murphy is upset about his success. It's like Gayle telling Oprah you are upset because she was hired by NBC. It’s like Janet telling Michael he’s not hot. It is like Hiliary accusing Bill of think of her only as a first lady.
Tamar is lying to herself, her sister, and the public when she says Toni or one of the other Braxton’s is jealous.
This reality tv genre deceives people into thinking popularity and notoriety is success. Regardless of how famous someone becomes at some point you have to ask what are they fame for? Fame for the sake of fame can easily become vanity.
Singers that are true artist aren't running around looking for the spotlight. They seek the best opportunities and venues to practice/showcase their craft and the spotlight is focused on them because of the ability. The bigger the star the more room there is for others to have their talents showcased. Tamar needs to spend less time recording tanning, eating out with the Braxton’s and fighting with her sister and focus on writing and get in the studio and record some music.