This is a tough one. On the one hand, James Franco did star in two of my favorite things ever ("Freaks and Geeks" and "Spider-Man 2"). On the other, Bridges is "The Big Lebowski's" Dude and Flynn from "Tron." Upon reflection, the answer is clearly Jeff Bridges. The guy can play a White Russian-swilling stoner who hangs out in his bathrobe all day and still be cool.

As for actresses, I've had a crush on Michelle Williams since "Dick" (that's a movie. Really) so this one's a no-brainer. She's my favorite nominated actress (as much as I liked Portman in "Black Swan," it's hard to look past how terrible she was in the "Star Wars" prequels) and, if I'm being completely honest, reminds me of a girl I had a crush on in college. On a related note: Who would've guessed that Michelle Williams would go on to be the "Dawson's Creek" star with the most respectable acting career? Not Katie Holmes, that's for sure.  

Naturally, I would most like to be James Franco. He's young, talented, lady loved, man approved, intellectually curious, and makes the most of his celebrity while apparently not taking it all too seriously. Also, do you realize all these nominees have" J" names except Colin? And, do you realize the Mayans predicted this as part of their 2012 Apocalypse thing?!*  

 

I would most like to have sex with Annette Bening and marry Natalie Hershlag "Portman." I think Nat and I would get along, and she's hotter than a swan in heat. My interest in intercoursing with Bening is not so much for the immediate body bumping, but just so I can cheer myself up when I'm feeling down. Buck up, Amit; remember, you're someone that's had sex with the great Annette Bening, and that's really neat!

Hmm, for the men I would say Bridges or Firth, except both are a good bit older than me, and I'm aging just fine without jumping ahead, thank you very much. Bardem is cool but he'll never live down that Anton Chigurh bowl cut from "No Country For Old Men." I don't want to be anyone who played Mark Zuckerberg, so that leaves only Franco--young, handsome, cool, and in the greatest TV show ever, "Freaks And Geeks." Yeah, that works.

As for the ladies, let's see... Annette Bening will always be the crazy beyotch in "American Beauty" to me, so she's out. Nicole Kidman--I would marry her, but only so I could tie her up and make her watch "The Hours" over and over and over again until she hates it as much as I did. I don't know Jennifer Lawrence, but on the off chance she's related to Joey Lawrence or Lawrence Taylor, I'm gonna pass. Natalie Portman is the obvious choice here.. which is why I'm not picking her. That's right--a curveball from the Wise-Ass. I'll take sweet little Michelle Williams, who looked pretty damn cute with that blonde bob on Nightline. She's also a mom and moms are hot.

Well, as much as I'd like to be a thinner Colin Firth, every last one of my friends said Jeff Bridges when I asked them. Maybe they are trying to tell me something. The date, or hook up, or whatever portion of her attention she cares to bestow approximately in my direction simply has to be Nicole Kidman. 

Proving that I only watch B-movies and comedies, I am so unfamiliar with each and every actor on this list it's ridiculous. With that in mind, I'm gonna go with Javier Bardem because I'm pretty sure he was in "No Country For Old Men" and that movie totally rocked. I just have no clue which role he played. Or actually if he was really in it since I'm too lazy to check. Half Baked for life. As far as the ladies? Natalie Portman all day. I mean did you see "Closer"? Terrible movie but she looked so hot in that movie it was crazy. Plus, I owe her for the thing with the guy at the place, and I'll never forget it.

I want to date, marry, sleep with, buy puppies for, compose symphonies in honor of, learn how to professionally breakdance for...Javier Bardem. And Natalie Portman's cool, so I guess I pick her to be. Except maybe not the preggers part?

OK, readers - which of the nominees would you most like to date? Let us know in the comments!