Answers in brief, with 75% less snark and 90% less BS than other answers. Because I love you. Well, most of you.
Why do guys say they love you, but don't commit?
Because talk is cheap.
How to deal with a man who tries to make you jealous.
Ignore it. He'll stop if it doesn't get a rise out of you.
I have been dating a guy for a year. I have not meet his parents but he tells me he loves me. He doesn't have a job and has 2 kids. I feel like he uses me when we go out. I don't know what to do?
Yes, you do. You just don't want to do it.
How can you tell if a guy is nearing a state of readiness to pronounce "I love you," or be able to hear "I love you" without engaging in a long awkward silence afterward?
You can't. Just roll with it. If you feel it, say it. If he doesn't reciprocate, it will be awkward but you will live. Life is short--be honest about your feelings, but remember that not everyone will feel the same way you feel about them. It's worth the risk.
Why is it that nice, funny hot chicks with good personalities get stood up?
Everyone gets stood up. Even funny hot chicks with good personalities.
My boyfriend rarely responds when I talk. If I make a random comment, such as "oh, look at that guy with the crazy hair, honey!", I'm usually answered with silence. I feel like I'm always talking to a wall. He says it's because i say mostly pointless things. Is this OK in a good relationship?
No. It's not the silence so much as the fact that he thinks you are an idiot. Move on. He's not the one.
After I slept with the last 2 guys I dated, neither called me back again. Is it time for me to assess whether I might just be so bad in bed that they ran for the hills?
Maybe. Or maybe they just got what they wanted and moved on.
I'm 20 & never had a boyfriend. I know the advice is to be happy with who you are & put yourself out there. I'm introverted. I like who I am, but my personality doesn't come across well in social settings. I have close girl friends but have a hard time talking to guys. I'm too insecure to go out alone. Suggestions?
You have two choices: force yourself to be bold and jump head-first into the dating pool, or wait until someone discovers you. The question boils down to how patient you are.
Why does this girl agree to hook up with me even though she really wants a relationship?
She's hoping one will lead to the other.
How do you go about asking him what his goals are and what is important to him? how do you sit down and actually have a real conversation? i want to share goals with him so we can grow.. how do i go about doing that?
Just ask him! Boom, you're having a conversation. He won't mind--people love talking about themselves.
So, breaks. Does going a break automatically mean that your relationship is doomed, or can it be a healthy thing to do?
Nothing is automatic; there are always exceptions. It also depends on whether or not the break is one person's idea or a mutual decision. A break can probably help in some situations, but then, how many married people do you know who separated and then got back together and stayed together?
Why do guys get into "fake" relationships? By that I mean, why do they date girls for only a month or so before breaking it off without so much as a goodbye? I was going out with a guy for a few weeks before he all of a sudden stopped talking to me and defriended me on Facebook. Did he not like me from the beginning?
That doesn't sound like something a normal guy would do without a reason. I think he liked you from the beginning but something obviously happened to turn him off. That doesn't mean you did anything wrong, necessarily.
Met a guy who seemed to show an interest in me, but upon reciprocating those feelings, he shut down completely. Was I wrong to try to flirt back?
Nope. You were just wrong about how he felt. It happens. Life goes on.
My spouse had to travel months at a time with a female coworker. They came to be best friends & he introduced her & her spouse into our group of friends. They text constantly even on holidays/family gatherings. Am I wrong to tell him he can only associate with her in couples and work situations but not one on one?
No. If it bothers you, you have every right to make that request.
Ok I'm a virgen and my bf is being deployed, he is worried I will leave him while he is gone, I want to have sex with him and prove I will be here waiting. One problem, I dont like pain and I hear the first time hurts and well my bf is certanly not lacking. So any way to make it hurt less with a dude thats bigger?
Having sex with him doesn't prove anything. If you want to have sex because you want to have sex, fine, but if you're only doing it to prove your loyalty to him, don't. Your word should be good enough. Just make sure you are truly willing to wait before you make that promise. It will be harder than you expect.
Why do guys say they love you, but don't commit?
Because talk is cheap.
How to deal with a man who tries to make you jealous.
Ignore it. He'll stop if it doesn't get a rise out of you.
I have been dating a guy for a year. I have not meet his parents but he tells me he loves me. He doesn't have a job and has 2 kids. I feel like he uses me when we go out. I don't know what to do?
Yes, you do. You just don't want to do it.
How can you tell if a guy is nearing a state of readiness to pronounce "I love you," or be able to hear "I love you" without engaging in a long awkward silence afterward?
You can't. Just roll with it. If you feel it, say it. If he doesn't reciprocate, it will be awkward but you will live. Life is short--be honest about your feelings, but remember that not everyone will feel the same way you feel about them. It's worth the risk.
Why is it that nice, funny hot chicks with good personalities get stood up?
Everyone gets stood up. Even funny hot chicks with good personalities.
My boyfriend rarely responds when I talk. If I make a random comment, such as "oh, look at that guy with the crazy hair, honey!", I'm usually answered with silence. I feel like I'm always talking to a wall. He says it's because i say mostly pointless things. Is this OK in a good relationship?
No. It's not the silence so much as the fact that he thinks you are an idiot. Move on. He's not the one.
After I slept with the last 2 guys I dated, neither called me back again. Is it time for me to assess whether I might just be so bad in bed that they ran for the hills?
Maybe. Or maybe they just got what they wanted and moved on.
I'm 20 & never had a boyfriend. I know the advice is to be happy with who you are & put yourself out there. I'm introverted. I like who I am, but my personality doesn't come across well in social settings. I have close girl friends but have a hard time talking to guys. I'm too insecure to go out alone. Suggestions?
You have two choices: force yourself to be bold and jump head-first into the dating pool, or wait until someone discovers you. The question boils down to how patient you are.
Why does this girl agree to hook up with me even though she really wants a relationship?
She's hoping one will lead to the other.
How do you go about asking him what his goals are and what is important to him? how do you sit down and actually have a real conversation? i want to share goals with him so we can grow.. how do i go about doing that?
Just ask him! Boom, you're having a conversation. He won't mind--people love talking about themselves.
So, breaks. Does going a break automatically mean that your relationship is doomed, or can it be a healthy thing to do?
Nothing is automatic; there are always exceptions. It also depends on whether or not the break is one person's idea or a mutual decision. A break can probably help in some situations, but then, how many married people do you know who separated and then got back together and stayed together?
Why do guys get into "fake" relationships? By that I mean, why do they date girls for only a month or so before breaking it off without so much as a goodbye? I was going out with a guy for a few weeks before he all of a sudden stopped talking to me and defriended me on Facebook. Did he not like me from the beginning?
That doesn't sound like something a normal guy would do without a reason. I think he liked you from the beginning but something obviously happened to turn him off. That doesn't mean you did anything wrong, necessarily.
Met a guy who seemed to show an interest in me, but upon reciprocating those feelings, he shut down completely. Was I wrong to try to flirt back?
Nope. You were just wrong about how he felt. It happens. Life goes on.
My spouse had to travel months at a time with a female coworker. They came to be best friends & he introduced her & her spouse into our group of friends. They text constantly even on holidays/family gatherings. Am I wrong to tell him he can only associate with her in couples and work situations but not one on one?
No. If it bothers you, you have every right to make that request.
Ok I'm a virgen and my bf is being deployed, he is worried I will leave him while he is gone, I want to have sex with him and prove I will be here waiting. One problem, I dont like pain and I hear the first time hurts and well my bf is certanly not lacking. So any way to make it hurt less with a dude thats bigger?
Having sex with him doesn't prove anything. If you want to have sex because you want to have sex, fine, but if you're only doing it to prove your loyalty to him, don't. Your word should be good enough. Just make sure you are truly willing to wait before you make that promise. It will be harder than you expect.
Great job with these, C. If people would just talk to one another, they could solve a lot of their own problems. I don't know why so many are afraid to try simple communication.
because it's not that easy. We already have problems with talking to ourselves, so talking to others, especially the loved one?
We worry to not put things right, and then to end up more damaged, or confused.
Hi, Cary. I asked the fake relationship question. Here's a little more background on the situation: I'm 21, he's 22. He's a first-year law student at my school and I'm about to graduate in the spring. We started hanging/going out over the summer when he moved here from New York for law school. Things were going fine for the couple of weeks that we went out, and then I went home to visit my family for a few days before classes started. It was when I came back from that visit that he stopped talking to me and defriended me on Facebook. Nothing happened between us to warrant such behavior and I just want to know why he pulled such a dick move.
Some people are just cowards. He decided it was easier to be a dick than to face you, I guess.
But I hear you-it's incredibly frustrating to be dumped without knowing why. You might never know, but you probably won't care after a few weeks. He sounds like a tool, so good riddance anyway.
How to deal with a man who tries to make you jealous.
Ignore it. He'll stop if it doesn't get a rise out of you.
He might also stop dating you because of ignoring it, because "you don't care enough" Obviously that's a manipulativeperson that does that, so you're better off without him, I was
Guys are sometimes so insecure, they just try to get your attention in any way possible, even the stupidest, as trying to get you jealous. They might think that you being jealous means you have some interest for him. Silly, but true.
Brooke, the SAME thing happened to me. I still have no idea why. I chalk it up to being a coward. Mainly because I found myself again in a similar situation and MY personal feelings changed. So I bailed without so much as a by you leave. That's when it clicked. People who do that do not want to face hurting someone or being hurt by their hurt.
Also, for the record, you could have done something so small and so stupid to have turned him off whereas another person would totally take it in stride. My deal was I witnessed him litter a candy wrapper. He just took the candy and threw the wrapper out the car window. That made me very angry. Another person who is not be who did not care about the environment or the low class rudeness of those who litter wouldn't have thought anything of it. It doesn't make him a bad person. It just makes him a litter bug and I cannot stand people like that. Now I wish I would have told him how I felt. But I thought that my feelings about it were too trivial when in fact I could have stopped his littering permanently. It's just one of those things.
I hope that helps.
"You could have done something so small and so stupid to have turned him off whereas another person would totally take it in stride."
Exactly.