Before you catch those last rays of summer, the guys have some advice that's so bright, you'll need SPF to read it. They'll dazzle you with pickup lines that actually work on guys, advice on sex while visiting your BF's mom, dealing with your mom when she asks to move in with your BF, tips on recognizing a rebound artist and ways to find love when you're ready to throw in the beach towel on romance. Get ready for a super end-of-summer edition of GuySpeak's Best of the Week!
What are the best 15 pick-up lines to use on guys?
Reformed Player says:
Once upon a time, guys and dolls had rules. The guy would throw out a line, and the dame would wince, coo, or go blind. Then the poor sad sack would slink back to his barstool, keeping an eye on his drink, and an eye out for another bird who'd let him sing his song.
These days, men are becoming more coy and stand-offish. Women, more confident. If you're a woman who is befuddled as to why there aren't any guys sweating you, then take the advice I've given tons of guys: practice. The more you practice, the luckier you get. The more you approach people, and talk to them, and genuinely act like you're a person who listens and has a sense of humor, the more likely it is you'll eventually bump into someone who is hungry for what you're cooking.
So, ladies, here are 15 pick-up lines you can use on guys to start a conversation.
1. Hi.
2. My name is ______. What's your name?
3. So, do you beer pong here often?
4. Was your father a demolitions expert? Because your eyes are dynamite.
5. If you were a woman, I'd say you have a pretty smile. But you're a man, so your smile is, um, bitchin'.
6. Am I dead? Because you're either an angel or a fearsome zombie killer.
Gal Pal says:
Read the rest of John's 200% guaranteed pick-up plan at the link above. Another sure-fire method? Flash him your birth control pills.
Funny Guy says:
You do whatever you need to. You sneak into his bedroom, or out of the house, or drill a hole in the wall between you. Space be damned...first anniversary's and 3,000 mile visits are for sweet loving, and you can't carry on without getting that checked off the list first.
If his mom really had a problem with sex, he wouldn't exist, let alone have a sister with a room she can use to cockblock you. Presuming you're both adults, the decision is yours. Be courteous: no one wants to hear noisy lovin' coming from their child's room. But making it happen is well within your rights, and who are any of us to stand in the way of true love (or even fleeting lust)?
Heck, the strained circumstances may spur you on to greater sexual heights than you ever imagined! There's nothing like a quickie in an elevator or a child's day-bed to remind you that you don't have your own place yet.
Gal pal says:
A mom I respect very much once said the following when her son's college girlfriend came to visit: "She's starting out in the guest room. Where she ends up later - I'll let her parents worry about that one." Your job is to be a sweet, respectful, young woman who's delighted to be invited into your boyfriend's home and will graciously stay in his sister's room. Where you end up later - that just depends on how flexible you are!
Wise Ass says:
Wow, that's a new one - Mom needs to move in with the kid. It's usually the other way around, but these are the economic times in which we live. Things are tough all over. You're right: if she moves in, it will likely affect your relationship with your boyfriend in a negative way. It won't help your relationship with your mom, either. Three's a crowd, and when the third one is your mom, it's not just a crowd, it's a Who concert. You might enjoy having her there at first, but things could go wrong quickly and in so many ways.
What happens when she starts telling you how to live your life? What if she's always there and never goes anywhere, like that cock-blocking loser roommate you had in college? What if your boyfriend resents suddenly having to share you with your mom? Will her presence stifle your sex life because you worry about her hearing you? The list could go on and on...
On the other hand, she's your mother. She carried you for 40 weeks, brought you into the world, fed you, clothed you, raised you. If the tables were turned, she would take you into her home without hesitation. She's your mom. You can't leave her on the street. It's a tough decision, but one only you can make. Good luck with it.
Gal pal says:
Lady, you cannot turn out your mom. It doesn't have to be a permanent move, but you are obligated to offer her a warm corner in your little love nest until she gets her wings back. Sure, it may cause some stress with your boyfriend. But guess what? Life is full of stress - it's important to see how the two of you cope with it as partners. Just remind him - and yourself -this isn't forever. After a few months, your mom will be brave enough to fly from the nest. And you can peck in privacy with your lovebird again.
Girl's BFF says:
The law of averages alone tells you that it will pay off at some point. Here's the thing about taking chances - there's a chance you will lose. But at least you're putting yourself in a position to win by playing the game.
I would suggest that if you keep getting burned then it's possibly because you give too much of yourself too soon. Then again, you are but a college girl, how burned could you have been by now? You have your entire 20s to look forward to in the realm of love and relationships (unless by college girl you mean Everest College girl which means you could be 37 at this point...shots fired?) so there shouldn't be a rush right now to find "the one." It will come in due time. Keep taking your chances with guys you deem decent and trustworthy. One of them will be the guy you're looking for and you'll be the woman he's looking for.
You're chances aren't slim-to-none, especially at your current age. Hit me back when you're 40 and maybe there's something to talk about.
Gal Pal says: Wonder how much mail Panama got from the 40-year-old cougars out there? But he's right - you are way too young to give up on love, life or relationships. Trust me, I'm an extremely late bloomer when it comes to love. I thought my options were zero-to-negative-fourteen when I was your age. But I was so, so, wrong. And he was so, so worth the wait. Patience, my pretty!
What are the signs you're just a rebound?
Chic Geek says:
The signs will be similar the ones given off by a guy who is just looking for sex, only with slightly more emotions involved. A guy on the rebound will mostly be looking for sex, but there could also be some couple-y, romantic stuff that makes it seem like he wants to get serious. Sadly, he's probably projecting his feelings for ex onto you. While you might end up in a relationship with Rebound Guy, he's most likely looking for a warm body to keep him company until he gets tired of weeping while looking at old photographs, stalking his ex on Facebook, and listening to the GuySpeak break-up song mix over and over again.
Here are a few signs to look out for:
1. He doesn't want to talk about his ex. Any talk of exes makes him suddenly get a sad, distant look in his eyes.
2. Conversely, he talks about his ex all the time. He brings her up out of nowhere, usually with bitterness. Perhaps he's still in touch with the ex over email or IM. "We're still friends," he'll say. Either way, she's a part of your time together.
3. He will have a strong reaction to certain songs, movies, TV shows, etc. that remind him of his break-up. Restaurants and bars that remind him of his ex will also be a no-no.
Gal pal says:
Read the rest of Nick's list at the link above. And things could be worse - at least you're not his "prebound" girl. (See Gal Pal's entire dating history.) Have a safe weekend and thanks for playing, guys and girls!
Leave a comment