It's that time again, mes amis. Some answers just write themselves.
How do I get laid?
I don't know, but when you find out, please tell me.
How do I get you to be serious for just a sec while I tell you that it's best we don't date?
Okay, I'll be serious. I agree, we shouldn't date. I'm married.
Is it normal for a guy to pee the bed?
Yes. If he's 2.
My boyfriend who is black told me that he prefers to date Mexican girls even though he has never been with one. Am I wasting my time being with him?
That depends. Are you Mexican?
Why does a man flex his arm muscles around me?
Either 1) He's Popeye, The Sailor Man, or 2) He has a tiny penis.
When a guy tells a girl,"I just want to be friends," what is he really thinking?
That he just wants to be friends.
The guy I went out with is 52 and I am 35. Do guys worry about age?
Not when they are 52 and dating 35-year-olds.
What's the difference between an "average" penis and a "large" one?
About two beers.
Why didn't the guy I'm sleeping with tell me he has a wife and kids?
Huh, I don't know. That's a real head-scratcher.
How do u ask a guy how he feels?
Say, "Hey, guy, how do u feel?"
How do I get my husband and kids to appreciate me?
Disappear for a week.
What do you think of Narsatics men?
I think I don't know what the hell that means.
I heard "a guy is only as faithful as his options"...how accurate is this statement?
Hmmm.. what are the options?
My girlfriend is pregnant. We are both 15. What do I do?
Find Cher and see if she ever figured out how to turn back time.
Why do guys take so long in the bathroom?!
You tell us. You made dinner.
I found my boyfriend cheating on me with my best friend.. I will kill them both.
Mmkay.
Is it wrong to masturbate even when married?
I hope not.
How do I let my virgin girlfriend know I really love her and want to have sex with her?
She knows, buddy.
See earlier volumes here and here.
How do I get laid?
I don't know, but when you find out, please tell me.
How do I get you to be serious for just a sec while I tell you that it's best we don't date?
Okay, I'll be serious. I agree, we shouldn't date. I'm married.
Is it normal for a guy to pee the bed?
Yes. If he's 2.
My boyfriend who is black told me that he prefers to date Mexican girls even though he has never been with one. Am I wasting my time being with him?
That depends. Are you Mexican?
Why does a man flex his arm muscles around me?
Either 1) He's Popeye, The Sailor Man, or 2) He has a tiny penis.
When a guy tells a girl,"I just want to be friends," what is he really thinking?
That he just wants to be friends.
The guy I went out with is 52 and I am 35. Do guys worry about age?
Not when they are 52 and dating 35-year-olds.
What's the difference between an "average" penis and a "large" one?
About two beers.
Why didn't the guy I'm sleeping with tell me he has a wife and kids?
Huh, I don't know. That's a real head-scratcher.
How do u ask a guy how he feels?
Say, "Hey, guy, how do u feel?"
How do I get my husband and kids to appreciate me?
Disappear for a week.
What do you think of Narsatics men?
I think I don't know what the hell that means.
I heard "a guy is only as faithful as his options"...how accurate is this statement?
Hmmm.. what are the options?
My girlfriend is pregnant. We are both 15. What do I do?
Find Cher and see if she ever figured out how to turn back time.
Why do guys take so long in the bathroom?!
You tell us. You made dinner.
I found my boyfriend cheating on me with my best friend.. I will kill them both.
Mmkay.
Is it wrong to masturbate even when married?
I hope not.
How do I let my virgin girlfriend know I really love her and want to have sex with her?
She knows, buddy.
See earlier volumes here and here.
HAHAHA!!! "Find Cher...", that killed me!
No wonder you're asking your faithful, seasoned readers for questions!
"About two beers" ~ Hilarious!
" When a guy tells a girl,"I just want to be friends," what is he really thinking? That he just wants to be friends." ~ How many times has this questioned been answered?
"What do you think of Narsatics men?"
It's funny when uneducated people try to use $5 words. I'm thinking they were going for "narcissistic".
You have certainly found your niche! Nicely done.
Somedays I wish I were you :)
HA HA HA HA HA! Another excellent volume to add to the collection. Fantastic job, Cary!
My favorite -- "Either 1) He's Popeye, The Sailor Man, or 2) He has a tiny penis." Still giggling here. =)
"Not when they are 52 and dating 35-year-olds."
Right on brutha.
"I found my boyfriend cheating on me with my best friend.. I will kill them both."
"Mmkay."
hahaha that was the funniest thing ever!!
Well done! The Cher answer killed me.
Yep... I'm a zombie.
Quick Answers are my FAVORITE! Can't wait for the next volume...Thanks Mr. Cary!
Cary, I love these volumes more than words can say. You are freakin' hilarious!
Partly because you're telling the truth, and partly because you are kind enough to answer questions submitted by poor souls suffering from a loose grasp on common sense, reality, and/or command of the English language. Maybe you can start a therapy booth.
"Find Cher" -- OMG! You are SO my favortie writer today. (okay, yes that's actually *every* day, but I didn't want to lay it on too thick. People might start to talk... :)
I'd say the disappear for a week answer got me to laugh alot then I read the Cher answer both had me in a giggle fit! Being gone for a week sure would get people to notice what you do for them more and hopefully not take you for granted as often and the turn back time, hell if it were possible how many of us would so we didn't get into trouble and such with life?