Apparently one of the latest fads in the wedding industry complex, something I'm up against constantly as the big day approaches, are wedding... I suppose the best term is "disinvitations". It's where you print up a nice, frilly announcement that you mail to all the people you are not inviting to let them know you're getting married and they aren't coming.
You know, because planning a wedding isn't stressful enough. Let's salt the earth with a bunch of emotional land mines designed to set off angry phone calls!
There are two camps about why it happens. The first is one I'm somewhat skeptical of, and that's the happy couple being a bunch of self-involved trolls who want to gloat. Don't get me wrong: I've been to a few bridal expos and the like, and I've seen couples like this in action. Heck, WeTV has a highly successful reality show about them. They exist. And I'm sure they love this idea.
But the second one is more credible; it's an attempt, however misguided, to try and tell a larger group directly that you're getting married but that, uh, we can't afford to have you come, sorry.
True, printing wedding stationery of any sort generally involves the kind of prices that make you wonder if they use unicorn blood or something, so that seems a bit of a weak justification. On the other hand, I've had this conversation at least three times:
"Hey, I heard you're getting married."
"Yeah, thanks, it's stressful but I'm looking forward to it."
"So, is it going to be a plus one situation or..."
"Oh. Yeah. Heh. You see, it's kinda like this..."
Granted, once the word "budget" leaves your lips, anybody who isn't an awful person generally gets the hint: We like you, but this costs and we have to cut somewhere. But it's still an awkward situation to have, and if there are, what's a nice way of putting this, pissy people in your life, the desire to just send them something in the mail is strong.
Personally, I'd rather have the awkward conversations. Really, anybody who is going to be angry at you for not buying them a steak is not somebody you want in your life, and it'll be good preparation for the many, many awkward conversations you'll have elsewhere while planning your wedding.