This week we celebrate the non-player. The tell-tale signs your man isn't shifty, shady, sketchy and straight up playing you. While this list isn't complete (or fail-proof) it does provide a solid foundation for you to assess your man's non-player-prowess.
Read the list, and score it up! I say anything over 11 and you've got yourself one fine-ass apple.
Your man is probably not be a player if he:
1. Reads short stories to you in bed.
2. Brings you a small towel to clean up yourself or the wet spot on mattress after sex.
3. Leaves you voicemails where he sings funny, romantic songs to you for fun.
4. Stares at you lovingly when you're not looking (but looking).
5. Sleeps over when you have a cold or stomach bug.
6. Remembers that thing in the store you really wanted and suprises you with it on a non holiday or birthday.
7. Tells you about his family in great detail.
8. Asks questions to your friends and their dates during dinners.
9. Agrees to come to your work party and or other quasi-awful social events.
10. Bakes you cookies.
11. Requests that you text him when you land to make sure you're all good.
12. Makes your bed and leaves a note on the pillow that doesn't sound like an R. Kelly lyric.
13. Has ever done your dishes - with his shirt on, not shirtless as some sort of sexy "look at me" pre-sex schtick.
14. Gets out of bed betwen 3am to 6am to either help you with your car or pick you up from the airport.
15. Gets giggly in front of you.
16. Checks his cell phone openly and care-free in front of you.
17. Has one personal email account and even gave you the password once so you can send him some timely info.
18. Has a social life that doesn't revolve around "the club" or "meeting up with some people".
19. Enjoys missionary sex.
Feel free to add more to the list or lodge a complaint with me below!
Follow me, Amit "Funny Guy" Wehle on Twitter @AmitWehle