Sex is important. It is so important, in fact, that the word "important" doesn't really express how important sex really is. The human race's continued existance relies on the fact that sex needs to constantly be happening, all over the world, all of the time. We are psychologically and physiologically predisposed to search for sex. Our minds release chemicals that make us want sex. Our bodies are covered in nerves that make us feel awesome during sex. Emotionally, we develop connections with people we have sex with so that we can have sex more.
Our very genetic makeup is bent towards getting us laid. The survival of the species depends on us getting laid. Society constantly tells us we should be getting laid. So, with all of that to deal with, is it a big deal if we've never gotten laid?
We all live in a sexualized world, but not all of us are having sex. Or have ever had sex. We here at Guyspeak write a lot about being a virgin and, shall we say, getting un-virgined. We write about it because people seem to always be asking about it. And that's not surprising. Sex is everywhere. We spend billions of dollars on looking sexy, spend hours watching television about sexy people, and spend emotional energy wondering if other people think we're sexy. So when you're a virgin, it is easy to feel like you're stranded on Planet Sex after a long flight from Planet No Sex. And being an alien generally means you have to ask a lot of questions.
Let me speak as both a Guyspeak writer and a reasonable human being. Being a virgin, even in this sex-all-the-time-and-everywhere world, is totally fine. It is not a big deal. We all started out as virgins. Some of us stay virgins forever. The rest of us lose our virginity as different ages and under different circumstances. So even though society and the media and your friends will make you feel awkward, strange or ashamed, you shouldn't be. Being a virgin really, truly, seriously is not a big deal.
Since we're on the subject of virginity and how much of a big deal it isn't, let me share some other insights that folks still carrying their V Card should keep in mind. Not every first time is wonderful. In fact, most are quite awkward. So don't expect fireworks during your first time. Fireworks come with practice and confidence. If you want to wait for marriage, please do. This may scare some men (or women) off, but trust your gut and wait until you're ready. There is no point in sacrifice a deeply held principle to keep someone that doesn't believe in what you believe in.
Being a virgin is not a big deal. But losing your virginity is, so don't rush into it and don't feel pressure to do it. It is a big, scary, sexual world out there, and people enter that sexual part of it at their own speed and in their own ways. If you're a virgin, you'll be ok. If your have friends or kids or younger brothers or sisters that are feeling the pressure, they'll be ok too.
Things like that just need mentioning from time to time.