I usually try to keep my posts positive here on GuySpeak, but since I recently blogged about 101 ways to turn a guy on, I figured you might want to hear about the other side of that. Luckily it's a lot harder to turn a guy off than to turn a guy on, so you get 11 instead of 101.
I should really call this "The 11 Quickest Ways To Turn Anybody Off," because they are as relevant to male behavior as they to female behavior. And none of these should surprise you. Consider this a gentle reminder. (Many thanks to my Facebook friends for their wise input.)
In no particular order:
Answering your cell phone or read texts during a date. No, you don't "need to get this," not unless someone is dying or there's a meteor about to strike our planet. If you absolutely must consult your phone during the evening, please wait until one of us goes to the restroom.
Smoking. Huge turn-off! Smoking is not cool; it's stupid and it looks stupid on you. It stinks, too, in case you hadn't noticed.
Talking trash about everybody. Constantly putting others down points to a lack of confidence in you. That's not attractive.
Having stank.ass.breath. Brush, floss, chew gum, whatever you have to do. Have a roommate or friend check your breath if you're not sure. This is a date killer.
"Accidentally" running into your friends on our date. What a coincidence that of all the bars and restaurants in town, your friends wound up in the same place we went! What are the odds? Not as high as the odds that anyone would fall for this silly old ruse.
Insecurity. If you are threatened by our family, friends (especially the opposite sex), or co-workers, it feels like you distrust us. Whether or not that's the case, the end result is a turn-off.
Being late consistently. A lack of punctuality reflects a lack of respect for the person(s) you're seeing. Everyone gets caught in traffic sometimes, but if you're never on time, we will assume that you just don't care.
Wearing ugly, nasty panties. Yeah, I know, I said in a recent answer that guys don't really notice lingerie, but I was talking about expensive lingerie. We do notice nasty underwear, just like you notice it on us. So if you think there's a chance we'll be getting naked together, forgo the period panties and we won't wear our skid-marked boxers.
Being vain. This one's tricky because there's a fine line between confidence and vanity. One is healthy and attractive, the other is neither. A confident person can walk through a room and give no thought to who's watching her or what they think. A vain person walks through a room and assumes that everyone is watching her and thinks she's hot shit. That's the difference.
Gossiping. The ugly step-cousin of talking constant trash. Gossiping makes you look petty. Petty = ugly.
Being rude. I've said this in other posts and it bears repeating: if you're nice to me but rude to the waiter, you're not nice. The true test of your kindness is how you treat people whom you are not trying to impress.
Okay, your turn. Instant turn-offs for either sex. Go.
RELATED LINKS
101 Things You Do That Turn Guys On
Another 22 Signs That He Likes You
88 Relationship Green Flags
I should really call this "The 11 Quickest Ways To Turn Anybody Off," because they are as relevant to male behavior as they to female behavior. And none of these should surprise you. Consider this a gentle reminder. (Many thanks to my Facebook friends for their wise input.)
In no particular order:
Answering your cell phone or read texts during a date. No, you don't "need to get this," not unless someone is dying or there's a meteor about to strike our planet. If you absolutely must consult your phone during the evening, please wait until one of us goes to the restroom.
Smoking. Huge turn-off! Smoking is not cool; it's stupid and it looks stupid on you. It stinks, too, in case you hadn't noticed.
Talking trash about everybody. Constantly putting others down points to a lack of confidence in you. That's not attractive.
Having stank.ass.breath. Brush, floss, chew gum, whatever you have to do. Have a roommate or friend check your breath if you're not sure. This is a date killer.
"Accidentally" running into your friends on our date. What a coincidence that of all the bars and restaurants in town, your friends wound up in the same place we went! What are the odds? Not as high as the odds that anyone would fall for this silly old ruse.
Insecurity. If you are threatened by our family, friends (especially the opposite sex), or co-workers, it feels like you distrust us. Whether or not that's the case, the end result is a turn-off.
Being late consistently. A lack of punctuality reflects a lack of respect for the person(s) you're seeing. Everyone gets caught in traffic sometimes, but if you're never on time, we will assume that you just don't care.
Wearing ugly, nasty panties. Yeah, I know, I said in a recent answer that guys don't really notice lingerie, but I was talking about expensive lingerie. We do notice nasty underwear, just like you notice it on us. So if you think there's a chance we'll be getting naked together, forgo the period panties and we won't wear our skid-marked boxers.
Being vain. This one's tricky because there's a fine line between confidence and vanity. One is healthy and attractive, the other is neither. A confident person can walk through a room and give no thought to who's watching her or what they think. A vain person walks through a room and assumes that everyone is watching her and thinks she's hot shit. That's the difference.
Gossiping. The ugly step-cousin of talking constant trash. Gossiping makes you look petty. Petty = ugly.
Being rude. I've said this in other posts and it bears repeating: if you're nice to me but rude to the waiter, you're not nice. The true test of your kindness is how you treat people whom you are not trying to impress.
Okay, your turn. Instant turn-offs for either sex. Go.
RELATED LINKS
101 Things You Do That Turn Guys On
Another 22 Signs That He Likes You
88 Relationship Green Flags
Great list, and yes, these do apply to both sexes. Going along with the bad breath, I would say poor hygiene of any kind is a turn-off. Not quite as strong as outright rudeness, but poor manners are a turn-off too. Guys who are stuck on themselves and can find nothing to talk about BUT themselves are a huge bore. Those who don't know how to compromise and those who never want to try anything new aren't much fun to be around either.
I don't give a rat's ass about your ex or who your ex is currently dating, sir or madam. Look, I understand casually mentioning a few facts about your ex during a date, but keep the ex talk to a minimum, please and thank you. I'm here to date YOU.
YES!
12. Talk about your ex all night.
Great list, Cary! I guess it's always smart to wear clean, nice panties, you know, just in case.
I think laziness is a turn-off in both men and women and also not taking one's health somewhat seriously. If I'm looking for longevity in a partner, I'm hoping they will be healthy. Unless they're rich, of course. ;)
Good list. Lots of these are just good old common sense.
Cursing.
I would also add getting drunk. I enjoy a cocktail but there is nothing worse than a drunk, crying, belligerent girl out in public. Pull it together, sister!
Pulling an "out of sight, out of mind." I don't care how enthusiastically you greet me and how well our conversation flows when we hang out; if between dates you can't be bothered to call me or even return my calls within a few days, I will take that as a sign that you just don't care about me and are too wimpy to tell me so. I will get extremely pissed at you, confront you, and if you don't fix the problem I will hopefully move on to someone else.
A massive turn off for me, is when people (esp when you've just met them) drone on and on about how much money they earn or how important/successful they are or drop into conversation that they own this and that. I think it's nice to be successful and to enjoy what you do for living but i find the whole hmm theres a pretty girl, she MUST be interested in money... "im loaded, are you impressed yet?" pick up is horrible.
That bothers me, too. It's insulting to my intelligence, as well as your own, that you think money will influence my decision to date you. I'll be the first to admit that I've had bad experiences with rich guys (apologies; y'all aren't bad!) so I generally go for blue collar types, though. Modesty's a big turn for me.
Also, being cheap. Whether or not they have money, if they're fighting over a few dollars or cents on a bill, it's also unattractive.