Cosmopolitan is, of course, one of the greatest satires ever written about how our society treats women and inflicts various insecurities and emotional problems on them. But recently, the satire hit new heights with the orgasm quiz.
Something that never fails to astound me is how far behind we are, scientifically, on the female orgasm. The search for "female Viagra" has mostly shown that men and women orgasm very, very differently. Not that this was a surprise to anybody who's observed both in action, but apparently, scientists aren't great at that whole "compare and contrast" thing.
Cosmo, in a brilliant send-up of insecurity, has a five-question orgasm quiz. Some of it is scientific: how long a female orgasm can last (quite a while), the likelihood of having an orgasm right after having another one (high), what a boobgasm is, and so on. Although for the record, Cosmo, if a guy "finishes" on your chest, that's called a "pearl necklace." It's important we use precise scientific terminology here.
Two things pop out about this quiz. First, that the recommended amount of foreplay for women is...twenty minutes. Says who, I'd like to know? It's as long as it needs to be.
Secondly, our own Mystery Man and myself passed around the quiz and...well, most people, men and women, young and old, bombed it. Which speaks less to their sexual prowess, I think, and more to how ridiculous it is to try and classify an emotional and physical response like it's an insect.
What a superb send-up of...wait...what?
Whaddayamean, they're serious?!
Oh, but a boobgasm is not the same as a pearl necklace.
Ugh. Cosmo sucks. I feel angry when I look at it, and when my ex unthinkingly buys it for our teenage daughters.
But maybe if I can look at it as a satire... hmmm...
I agree that they are not really appropriate for teen girls. When my daughter bought one for herself I used it as a great opportunity for some honest sex education. The contents of these mags are what our girls hear at school and when hanging with friends, so us moms of girls might as well use these articles as a topic for today's sex ed lesson.
I call bullshit on the info in the articles and give her the truth. We laugh and she learns.
My daughter does see the magazine as satire.
Lol, my favorite part is the extreme over-generalizations.
I'm still trying to figure out what Cosmo's writers were thinking when they recommended that wire head-massage thingy as a "sex toy".
Cosmo tends to advise that all men love a good finger up the bum, thats a fast course for an awkward break-up....
Or a broken finger at least.
They are crazy man......
The twenty minute foreplay mention is, I'm assuming, from the "scientific knowledge" that it takes most men two about minutes to be turned on enough for orgasm, whereas it takes most women about twenty minutes. However, I agree with you: it takes as long as it takes. Every person is different, and every moment/mood is different.
All that said, I don't read magazines, and I haven't touched a Cosmo since I was 19 yrs. old, if not even before then. It's nothing but crap.