We get a lot of questions here on Guyspeak, and choosing which ones to answer is difficult. Which sometimes is not helped by the question. So in honor of the question I just answered that I call "The Blowjob Algebra Question", here are three of my more favorite baffling questions.
"if a man wants you to tie him up, does that mean he wants you to marry him"
I think you're reading a bit too much into a kinky request, madam. At least I think so; equating marriage with being tied up with ropes seems like a rather unhealthy approach to the whole thing.
On the other hand, it is a positive sign that he trusts you with something he probably doesn't tell everyone. Kinky people have trouble, sometimes, revealing what they want to their partner because they're afraid of being judged. So, even if he's not ready for marriage, he trusts you.
"My man says he only hooked up with a guy once and he was drunk, so it doesn't count. Is he gay?"
This is, by far, my favorite "is he gay?" question (which we get a lot of), because it always reminds me of the hilarious "It's Not Gay If..." list a friend compiled of excuses he's heard from hookups about what they just did not being gay.
It's Not Gay If...
You were drunk.
Your balls didn't touch.
You didn't kiss on the mouth.
You didn't take it up the butt.
You like football.
You're between girlfriends.
You got a taste for it in prison (yeah, that was somebody he ran away from really quick).
My point is, denial is a deep and bottomless river, and he will swim in it right up until he can't. He may be bi, but he should probably confront how he feels before getting in a serious relationship with anyone.
"If I'm trying to get a boy drunk enough to sleep with my friend, what beer should I use?"
Beer goggles are not a solid foundation for a relationship. Good night!
"if a man wants you to tie him up, does that mean he wants you to marry him"
I think you're reading a bit too much into a kinky request, madam. At least I think so; equating marriage with being tied up with ropes seems like a rather unhealthy approach to the whole thing.
On the other hand, it is a positive sign that he trusts you with something he probably doesn't tell everyone. Kinky people have trouble, sometimes, revealing what they want to their partner because they're afraid of being judged. So, even if he's not ready for marriage, he trusts you.
"My man says he only hooked up with a guy once and he was drunk, so it doesn't count. Is he gay?"
This is, by far, my favorite "is he gay?" question (which we get a lot of), because it always reminds me of the hilarious "It's Not Gay If..." list a friend compiled of excuses he's heard from hookups about what they just did not being gay.
It's Not Gay If...
You were drunk.
Your balls didn't touch.
You didn't kiss on the mouth.
You didn't take it up the butt.
You like football.
You're between girlfriends.
You got a taste for it in prison (yeah, that was somebody he ran away from really quick).
My point is, denial is a deep and bottomless river, and he will swim in it right up until he can't. He may be bi, but he should probably confront how he feels before getting in a serious relationship with anyone.
"If I'm trying to get a boy drunk enough to sleep with my friend, what beer should I use?"
Beer goggles are not a solid foundation for a relationship. Good night!
Damn, That "Is he gay?" one had me howling.
ditto to MM lol i would just love to be a fly on the wall of a room you all are having conversations in lol my 9 yr old recently said to me, "all women are crazy, mom." i read stuff like this and that's a tough one to argue lol
LMAO! This is awesome.
You like football...., BAHAHAHAHA!!!!!
Liking football makes me laugh because it's such a gay sport. Guys in tights going after one another, tackling one another, over a ball. If that's not gay, I don't know what is. And other men enjoying watching it. Ahahaha.