Women and men love fighting. Why else would we do it so often, right? Still, there is something miserable and sad about screaming at each other like two 8th graders fighting over the same crush. And almost without fail we wind up hurling insults and digs at each other rather than speaking/yelling about the actual issue at hand. While I don’t want to strip you or your man of the joy and honor of howling at each other – of calling someone a “complete and total As*hole” or “worthless d*mbf*ck”, I would like to point out just a few things to keep in mind before the gloves get laced. Ideas or things to consider that may in fact help to re-calibrate that venom and take notice of that annoying little bastard known as perspective and grace.
1. If you were him would you do the same?
2. Is this the first time he did this sh*t?
3. Was it done on purpose?
4. What exactly hurts?
5. If I count to 100 or better yet jogged or took a walk first, might I be able to communicate my anger more effectively?
6. Do I actually want to share how I feel or am I more focused on revenge? AKA am I in “the hurt me, now I hurt him” mode?
7. HWGBBOETMAMHT? (How would Gandhi, Big Bird or even the most AWESOME ME handle this)?