Tag: Rejection

Q: What do you do when a woman you like has "daddy issues"? We're both 22 and she keeps telling me I'm "good-looking, nice, dependable and boyfriend-worthy", but that she can't bring herself to look past my age. She's never pursued a man younger than 40, even when she was in her teens.

A: How do you know she has "daddy issues"? Are you a therapist? Can you see inside her mind? People are so quick to label a...

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Q: How do you say no to a guy who asks you to hangout without hurting his feelings?

A: You can't. There's no way to reject someone without hurting his feelings at least a little bit. Such is life. Dating rej...

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Q: I'm 21, and a lot of guys won't date me because apparently (according to them) I'm the wife/wifey type. What does that even mean? Am I screwed for forever? Because I feel like giving up.

A: I have no idea what that means, sorry. I've heard people talk about the kind of girls you date versus the kind you marry...

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Q: CM, you say that men are always thinking about sex. If that's true, why does my husband claim to have no sexual appetite? It's crushed my self-esteem that he doesn't want to touch/kiss/be touched by me, though he claims he doesn't want sex with anyone else either. For a guy who was VERY sexually active before me, is that possible?

A: Well, I was exaggerating, of course. Men don't really think about sex all the time. We think about it a lot of the time,...

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Q: How do you get over a guy who isn't into you? Is there some sort of step by step guide? You'd think with my 100% rejection rate I would have perfected it by now, but I haven't.

A: You get over it by saying to yourself: "The guy wasn't into me. It happens. It doesn't make him a bad guy or me a loser,...

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Q: My ex broke up with me 6 mths ago w/o giving me a reason. I accepted the break up and haven't made any contact with him. I miss him and would like to get back together. Is it a bad idea to mail him a package filled with mementos of our relationship--places we went, things he had given me--to tell him i want to try again?

A: Don't waste your time. He dumped you without the courtesy of an explanation, and you haven't heard a peep from him in mo...

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Q: So, Wise Ass, why can't guys just be honest with how they feel? If a guy says he'll call tomorrow and doesn't, why didn't he just say that he wasn't interested? I mean, I'm a gay guy and I'm even baffled by it!

A: Because it's easier to lie to your face and avoid an awkward situation than to tell you the truth. We all do it, don't w...

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Q: My husband says he doesn't like to sleep upstairs in our bed. It's always been that way, but it really makes me feel rejected. I do not suspect that he is cheating. I just feel that our literal marital bed is important and should involve both of us. What is your take?

A: I agree with you. The marital bed is important, and you both should be sleeping in it. Call me old-fashioned. It's not e...

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Q: I finally got the guts to go out with a guy I met online and it was terrible. He was awkward, kinda judgmental, and after an hour, neither of us were feeling it. I know dates are allowed to go badly, but this date has killed my confidence. I brought my "A" game for a guy who made me feel like crap. What do I do now?

A: Why did it kill your confidence? You said yourself he was kind of douchey, so why blame yourself for not hitting it off ...

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Q: How do you turn down a guy nicely? Without making it awkward?

A: You say, "I'm very flattered, but unfortunately I'm not available. Thank you for asking, though." It's nice and it's not...

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Q: I love that you tell it how it is WA. I met a guy, we hit it off, he asked for my number, and I never heard back. What is that? Should I ask him out, or am I just wasting my time?

A: Thank you. I don't know why he didn't call you. There are any number of possible reasons. Maybe he lost your number. May...

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Q: How do I try to console my bf about his college rejections? Do I or don't I try to make him feel better?

A: Of course you can try to make him feel better, but I wouldn't bring it up unless he does first. When he does, the best t...

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Q: After dating for about a month, he broke things off with me - he didn't see a future. Now a month later he is asking me to hang out a few times a week and says he misses me? I still like him, but I doubt he wants a relationship just the same as before. What to do?

A: What is it that you think he wants from you, if not a relationship? Sex? A FWB scenario? Or just very casual dating? Her...

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Q: Is it too desperate if I mail him? I asked him out, he said yes, I said I couldn't on this and that day but am free otherwise. No response. It's been 3 days and I'm going on holiday soon. Can I mail him to ask him what's going on?

A: Of course you can. But don't. You asked him out and told him when you are available. Your work is done. The ball is in h...

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Q: I recently lost a lot of weight and I'm getting lots more attention from guys than I used to, especially ones I'm attracted to. But I find myself resenting them because I know they wouldn't have given me the light of day 70lbs ago. What should I do?

A: Congrats on your weight loss. That is an incredible accomplishment. I know from experience that losing weight is a lot h...

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Q: Is it normal to get hung up on the first person to reject you? I'm not pining for him, or anything, but my heart does still kind of jump when I see him.

A: It is if you have a tremendous ego. It's not like you said the first to make you feel like a natural woman. You said the...

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Q: I know you receive many a question about guys disappearing on girls. I'm more concerned with closure - is it reasonable to ask him the reason(s) behind his Houdini act? I'm debating whether I should send the schmuck a "what gives?" email or just move on.

A: Is it reasonable to want to know why he never called back? Sure. Is it reasonable to want to ask him? Yes. Should you do...

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Q: I went on a bad date with this guy I work with. He keeps asking me to hang out again. I feel bad so I keep agreeing. How do I get him to back off with hurting his feelings?

A: For starters, stop agreeing to go out with him if you don't like the guy. Your intentions might be honorable, but you're...

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